“Your biggest eyes have been used to assume the worst in others” -Shay-lon Moss
So for the past couple of days or so, i have been trying really hard to post different topics on each blog site because I thought that was the “way to go” but then I realized, its probably not the best option because not everyone uses other blogging sites. For those of you who do not already know this, I have a tumblr, wordpress and google blogger account and so I realized not everyone has each of these like I do so not everyone can see what I post if I post something different on all of them, I want to make it easier for all of you & make my new goal copying all my post from each site onto one another so that EVERYONE sees EVERYTHING. If you do have all three of these or 2/3 of these and follow me.. I will still try to make one of them more or less different if I can but I am focusing on making them all the same so no one misses out. Below I will post what I posted yesterday on my google blogger & both of them are on tumblr as we speak.
“When one steps inside the gym, he looks to see who is watching”
Today I want to talk about “gym judgement”. For those of you who may not have heard of this phrase it’s because I just made it up. Gym judgement is when you assume why someone attends the gym, why someone has the body they have, making light of someones bad form but not helping them correct it, making light of your body when know its better than someone else’s, laughing at someone who doesn’t lift as much as you do, making sure eyes are on you when you workout because you want to show off and prejudging everyone in the gym. Guess why I am speaking on this particular topic? because it happens & I have witnessed it the past 3-4 days now at my gym. Now before someone decides to say “everybody passes gym judgement” , you are correct but not everyone does it the same way. Gym judgement can also be a good thing when it’s used positively. Which I will explain.
Negative gym judgement examples:
- she has cellulite
- she shouldn’t wear leggings while working out because her legs are flabby
- who walks the treadmill? seriously.
- grandma needs to stay home because she obviously can’t move worth a shit
- this guy is only lifting ______ pounds.. what a joke
- he/she has bad form, they shouldn’t use the machine if they can’t use it properly
- he/she comes here everyday, but still manages to be fat
- that chick is super skinny, she should probably gain some muscle.
- omg, who wears that to a gym..
- wearing clothes that show more skin than necessary
- drawing attention to yourself because you know you “look good”
- lifting more weight than necessary but not able to use correct form/technique
Now some of these are verbal and others are non verbal ques of gym judgement. It’s making a conscious decision to make light of other people’s flaws while they workout & to puff your head up while you workout to make others around you feel intimidated or uncomfortable. Its become apparent to me, that three men at my gym have made it pretty clear they enjoy gym judging people. Actually they say much worse about the people, then I stated above but I choose to not type those words out. Normally their victims are elderly, young girls, young guys, anyone who seems “weak”, “ugly”, or overweight or vulnerable. These three men don’t make light out loud of course but they say things where I can usually hear it if I am near them or enough to make the person walk away & ignore them. Mind you these men are middle aged men, probably late 30s early 40s.. and its really ridiculous they come to the gym to workout and ridicule others.
Positive gym judgement example:
- Helping someone fix their form/technique and explaining to them why
- complimenting someone on how well they are doing
- Taking the time to realize everyone goes to the gym for the same reasons: to workout
- Wearing appropriate clothing that doesn’t have to show your assets to make a point
- staying humble but confident enough to do your workout and feel good
- lifting weight that you know you can lift without destroying your form/technique
- learning from someone else how to do a certain exercise
- talking to fellow gym members to understand their reasoning for wanting to workout
- have a positive attitude
- don’t compete to show off
- keep your jokes about people’s appearance to yourself and do not make light of it.
- ask yourself if that was your grandma would you want someone to talk to her like that? if that was your mom or sister or brother, would you want people to laugh at them?
Again these might not all be something you are interested in, but these are positive ways to attend a gym and get the most out of them. Some of the negatives are also another form of body shaming, and its sad because people want to come to the gym to improve, gain confidence, feel good, socialize, to “get away”, lose weight, gain muscle. The gym can be someones safe haven but when people tear people down instead of uplifting them, it makes it harder for people to want to go. I know females can be quite harsh toward other females; when it comes to body and appearance but it needs to stop because at some point you might hit an ultimate low point in your life and trust me you will not want someone to continually tear you down.
Maybe some of you may know someone who is negative when they attend the gym or people who make light of others flaws instead of helping them, maybe you are one of these types of people yourself. We all judge people, I do know this, even I do on a daily basis. but when I pass judgement at the gym, most likely I also try to help that person or put myself in their shoes because I have no idea how that person may feel or handle it, not to mention I never want someone to ever feel uncomfortable around me or intimidated. As for the three men at the gym who seem to enjoy passing negative judgement toward others at the gym, I plan on saying something to them if I hear of it again.
All-in-all just be aware of your mindset when you attend a gym and see people of all body types and training levels, keep in mind some people may struggle and that’s when you help and show them the way or maybe find someone who can or just ignore it and focus on yourself if you don’t care. Either way, just make sure you keep your mind open and comments to yourself if you have to be negative.
Thank you for reading, comment, like, follow and share.
Your blogger Shay-lon