PR’s are cool, but..

Personal records are cool and all, but don’t allow them to define your worth. Of course, for professional athletes in weightlifting & powerlifting, we use those PR’s to determine where we are at within our goals and wanting to increase weights, but sometimes we need to take a step back and re-evaluate the situation and look at the bigger picture; which happens to be our consistency and dedication. I love a good ego boost when hitting heavier weights, but sometimes it can be a huge hit to the ego when I don’t hit a new PR each week, its almost like we get rejected after putting in so much work. I’ve known people to rely on their PR’s and when they don’t hit one, they give up or get angry with the process. Not always is a PR a good thing, not when you are pushing your body beyond its means in order to gain it (unhealthy manner), not when you are sacrificing attitude and dedication to achieve it. I figure it like this, if you hit a PR — AWESOME! but if you don’t, and sometimes you won’t, then take it with a grain of salt, because we are human and we aren’t perfect 100 percent of the time. 

The point of working out, regardless if you are an athlete or not, is to stay healthy, to discipline yourself & to gain insight on your strengths and weaknesses (while working on the weaknesses to make into strengths) and of course to enjoy the process no matter how hard it gets, because in time, it will pay off. If you forget those steps & focus on hitting new PR’s each week, it will get old fast & it will weigh you down when it comes time you fail. I want PR’s to be a bonus to your workouts, a goal that is achievable & as a means of an ego boost to your confidence; all the while pinpointing your weaknesses before a competition so that you can use it to excel. Your gym worth is based on how you feel when you leave the gym, how you feel about yourself when you see small bouts of progress or obstacles that seemed rather hard but you hurdled; nothing compares to the process. It’s like watching yourself evolve. PR’s shouldn’t hold you down, or make you feel weak, they should give you a reason to keep pushing, prevent you from wanting to give up and make working out a fun journey. Even so, being an athlete, it’s hard not wanting to PR frequently in our sport and as a powerlifter, you learn that PR’s can come from various forms (not just lifting heavier) — and while that is the overall goal, you hope to see yourself transform into a stronger person in other ways as well. 

Thanks for reading, hope all of you enjoyed a fun tip to share with your peers, feel free to reblog, share, comment and like!

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#BEGREATGUYS Tip #10 Making It A HABIT

Can’t expect to start something for only a few days — you have to make it a “lifestyle” change aka habit/routine. 

We can all start something, but how long before you decide to give up or try a new method? Fitness works the same way, if you want results; patience has to form along with being able to give it a go for longer than a few days. Nothing is given without the effort; you have to make fitness/ your health a part of your everyday, it can’t be for a month & expect long term changes, it needs to be for a lifetime if you want to be healthy for a lifetime. 

The problem is, everyone wants something “quick” & “easy” but what people forget is, there is no magical pill, or supplement that will do all the work for you (not even steroids) you have to be the one to put in the work if you want something to happen. Time is not on our sides, I know this but there is always time to take care of yourself — the smallest forms of doing so can bring the best results if you keep at it & make it routine. There is this saying that ‘after 21 days of doing something, it becomes habit’ & making exercise & eating a good nutritional meal is a good habit to have for the longevity. Once something becomes a lifestyle change, something that just happens without thought — it makes the process of reaching goals so much easier. 

habits are formed best with routine & self discipline. In order to make time for your health and well-being, you need to add it to your schedule FIRST, then you need to DO IT, and then you need to make it a priority in your life; that way you live the best life you can & feel the best. 

Owner of Confident Fit, LLC 

ACSM Certified Personal Trainer 

Sponsored Athlete 

Shay-lon Moss

BEGREATGUYS Tip #9 Acceptance but not complacent

We have come quite a long ways; to a point where most people on social media seem to be more positive towards others bodies and choices of sport, and their lifestyle choices. Even more beautiful is the self love I see on social media from men and women alike, who have stood up to the bullies and have chosen to speak on how they don’t feel any less self confident with themselves anymore because they have chosen to love who they are — I know body shaming still exist on and off social media; and it probably won’t cease anytime soon, but when I see how people choose to handle it, it makes me smile because everyone’s body and genetic make up is different & we never really know another person’s journey. Saying this, I have decided that there are two things that I believe are important when it comes to the body & how one should treat it. 

  1. Acceptance – In other words accepting your body for all the flaws it may have, being able to accept the fact that we are all different & unique; that we can’t compare ourselves to others because each journey is different & each person has their obstacles. Our genetic make up can be a curse or it can be a blessing/ or perhaps a mix of both but it is who we are before we work towards changing it. Accepting your body today, tomorrow and in the future will bring a more positive perspective & learning to accept someone else’s body is showing that you respect their choice even if you don’t agree with it. 
  2. NOT staying complacent – This is where you change what you want to make better & learn from trial/error what works best for your body. While you have accepted its flaws, does not mean you cannot work towards progress and make new results that will make you feel much more confident inside & out. Choosing to not be complacent means you want growth & growth means you constantly want to be the best person you can be. Success is golden if you aim for better but not perfect & sometimes even if results don’t come when you plan on it, they come when you least expect it and challenge you to keep pushing even when the odds are stacked against you. While accepting another person’s body flaws and lifestyle choices is respectful, it doesn’t mean you can’t motivate them to want to better themselves — maybe a simple understanding of where they started and where they are now & where they see themselves will be enough to encourage them to keep going. 

As a personal trainer & athlete, I have taught myself to love my body even on bad days but to always seek for improvement — because improvement is possible. If I want something bad enough, I work towards it at a reasonable pace that works best for me. I have taught my clients to say positive things about their bodies but to demand the change they want to see by working towards their goals with my help. The more we teach ourselves to accept the flaws but go after changes that allow us to grow; I believe it will create a body positive experience. 

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Shay-lon 

BEGREATGUYS Tips #8

USE Your Failures As Strengths 

If you are going to remind yourself of your failures, then make them into strengths. Might as well make them useful and to your benefit. I’d rather you remember the times you failed or gave up in order to push you than to forget about them; only to end up in the same position you are in now: struggling with trying again. We have all been unsuccessful at something (work, fitness, sports, etc) and regardless if it happened in front of many people or in your own privacy — it still sucked nonetheless. Out of anger and frustration, we try again, only to fail once more because instead of using the failure as willpower, we used it to fuel our negative mindset. I can’t promise the voyage will be easy, but I can tell you one thing: it will be useful. 

I am going to share some simple steps to follow so that when the time comes, you have the power to continue:

  1. Don’t do it with anger or malicious intent. In remembering your failures, it can be hard to think that maybe you aren’t great at something, but it doesn’t mean you can’t get better — if you try again in a relaxed, focused state, you will be better off.
  2. Don’t assume the worst before beginning. It’s easy to assume that if we failed once, we are bound to do it again BUT don’t get caught up with that; that leads to anger/frustration & you lose focus on what is important
  3. Have to be willing to accept either path. It isn’t guaranteed that if you try again you will prevail the second time round; you may fail again but the goal is to try again and get better each time. 
  4. Don’t be afraid to fail in front of others. Allowing your pride to get the best of you, will only hinder you. Failing at something in front of somebody doesn’t make you weak, it makes you stronger. Don’t be worried about what someone may think or say, just worry about producing results
  5. Change your vocabulary. Utilize words that push you: I can, I will, It’s possible, Keep trying , etc. Using negative words can lead to negative thoughts and not so great results. 

For every time I have given up on something, I have regretted it later on. You never know what you are truly capable of, until you have given it all that you have more than enough times to count — Shay-lon

BEGREATGUYS — Don’t rely on someone

Save some of your motivation from within. 

 

We all need a little bit of a boost to keep going – to know we are headed in the right direction — to keep us accountable — to make us feel good about how far we have come. 

Indeed all of this is true, and I believe having a partner in crime that keeps you focused and disciplined and makes it possible for you to keep going is a great opportunity and needed — because social support is important. On the other hand, relying on your partner in crime, in order to succeed might weigh you down long-term and keep you from exploring outside your comfort level — or prohibit you from taking a leap of faith.  I think too much of a good thing, is just that, too much of a good thing. We need someone to keep us grounded, but when that someone backs down after awhile, we need to know how to use what we have within to keep up from giving up. 

 
 

As a personal trainer, i like to think it is my job to be a cheerleader, role model, knowledgeable professional in the field of fitness/health and an accountability partner that creates workouts and talks to you about what specifically will get you from point A to point B. I love my job and I love that I can build people inside & contribute to their physical changes that make them feel good. I just wonder sometimes if people whom rely on their trainers, realize that at some point, it will be time for you to leave the nest and utilize all the teachings so that you become independent at the gym. Now, I am not against having a long term client because everyone meets their goals at different lengths of time & everyone’s goals are different how they go about them BUT at the same time, when I am relied on, I don’t want it to be so that when and if I go on vacation; my client decides to quit working out until I return. I want my clients to be self sufficient enough that if I should be gone for a short period of time, they can manage on their own. It’s profitable to have a client rely on me, but it doesn’t make me look good when I have a client for years who has yet to reach any of their goals or who has yet to be able to gain enough confidence to workout without me being physically there every waking moment. I don’t want to kick my clients to the curb but I want to know that they are growing independently, building self esteem, and maintaining their success in the process of having me train them & I know it will take time. 


But not only from a trainer perspective but also from a friend/neighbor/spouse/family, etc perspective… 

We shouldn’t allow these people to feel so pressured. Having a friend who comes to the gym with you is fun, motivating and keeps you on your feet but what happens when that person misses a few days? Normally, the first thought is to stop going for a few days as well because you don’t want to workout without them. The motivation you have stems from being able to workout with your friend, so when a friend misses a day or two, that becomes your excuse for missing a day or two. Basically when you realize you aren’t meeting your goals and aren’t seeing results, the blame will fall on your friend because in your mind, because your friend missed a few days– you weren’t able to meet the requirements it takes to meet your goals. Not saying you will legitimately blame them to their face, but when someone ask why haven’t you been attending the gym anymore; it will fall back on your friend — “I normally come when my friend comes, and he hasn’t been able to make it back in so when he feels better or starts back on his normal routine, we will be back”. Nobody should take the blame for your lack of choice to do something, because when it comes down to it, you have the time and the reason for wanting to workout– but you have co-depended on someone for so long in order to workout that when it comes time to come on your own, it’s too intimidating & you make them the excuse. 


When you want something bad enough… 

It should come from within, it should fuel you enough to start and to finish. Having an extra person to root for you is good, but sometimes people don’t root and don’t support, so you have to be prepared to conquer things on your own. Prepare to endure many things on your own, so that if the time should come where you lose that partner in crime or lose that support — it doesn’t prohibit you from continuing on your journey. Life doesn’t always play fair and in order to make the best of the lemons thrown at us, we need to rely on ourselves for the most strength. I am a firm believer that having social support is a wonderful thing, but I stand by that people can either bring you up or weigh you down; you have to stay in control of yourself and not allow someone else to be your driver. 


Anybody can play backseat driver to our choices, but you are the one driving, so the only person who can control your steering wheel is you” — Shay-lon Moss

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BeGreatGuys Monday Motivation #6

“Do what you said you were going to do”

In other words, whatever it is you said you would do, that you have to do, that you want to do – DO IT!  

 

The problem is we get caught up on words, we say things but have a difficult time putting forth the action – for example: “I want to open my own gym”, that’s something someone wants to do, but the problem is, they aren’t doing anything about it and if they are doing something — they are running out of patience and not seeking the help they need to make that into an action; in turn, giving up or complaining. I realize owning a gym would be difficult for most people (expenses, responsibility, learning the business side of things, taking a risk, seeking employees, etc. BUT it is POSSIBLE. Maybe in the moment it seems like a fantasy that has a low percentage of happening but in the scheme of things, what is it that keeps you from trying anyways. If it is money, what can do you to raise enough money, hell better yet, what is a more affordable way to own a business until you are able to afford a big enough building or lot? I have known many companies to start small — and as soon as they start earning customers and revenue, they grow, they prosper. You go from selling products and training from your garage to now owning a huge gym that sits in a nice lot that serves thousands of people. It is POSSIBLE. 

 

The reason I made this post was not only to give you some motivation, but to give me some motivation, some insight on what I already know and to give me the boost of confidence to think outside of the box and not give up because something isn’t coming “easy” for me. I started a business recently, my OWN business, hell, it is very new and a huge risk for me, because I have very little information on how to go about it and to be honest, I haven’t put the amount of effort into it, that is necessary and that’s strike one against me. I want to put the effort into it and make it grand & here I am saying this but not providing any action — so all the while I am telling you to put forth action towards your goals; I need to do the same for myself, and not wait another day to do so, but do it NOW because it is POSSIBLE. 

 

Your goal can be as small as: “I need to visit my grandmother this week”, well if that is important to you, why haven’t you done it? why is work, school, relationships and traveling your excuse? when something is important to YOU, you will know how important it is, because you make time for it, you make an effort no matter the circumstances. If work and traveling is keeping you from visiting grandmother, than why not make that effort to call or message her? if  not having transportation is the issue, then why not use your resources? It’s not to make you feel guilty but to make you realize that the things we say we should do and need to do, can be done if we look at the time we have and spend it wisely and make time for things that we put off; make time for people that we put on hold, and make time for goals that we are passionate about. In a nutshell, I am the last person to tell you how to have ‘better time management’ because I feel as though I fail in that area in the recent years, however, I do know I don’t always spend my time wisely and I don’t always utilize my resources and sometimes I make excuses and put things off for “tomorrow” but while working out today at the gym, I came to think that I need to put myself on a schedule/routine when it comes to my life outside of the gym because otherwise I fail to do what is important & I make more excuses. Is this you?

 

We won’t be perfect. It will be challenging sometimes & we will get frustrated, possibly even overwhelmed with anxiety. That’s to be expected when you have goals and aspirations and passions in life — but the end result will be: a sense of accomplishment, a sense of progress, a sense of productivity and growth. All of those things will come if we DO WHAT WE SAID WE WERE GOING TO DO. 

 

Hope you have enjoyed this read, if so, please feel free to follow, share and leave comments 😀

 

Twitter: ShayM_Fitness

Email: Shay.moss19@gmail.com

BEGREATGUYS Motivation Monday #6

HAPPY MONDAY!

Be Great!

Today’s motivation isn’t lengthy and doesn’t have a whole story attached to it, instead it’s simple. 

 

“Be Great, in other words, make the most out of your life” – Shay-lon