How To Handle Your Gym-Intimidation

The Gym Can be scary for anyone

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3y73bl-Q2OQ

This was my video on gym-intimidation, make sure to read the description box under the video as well. Thank you ūüôā

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Is “Strong the New Skinny”

So the newest saying from around the block is “strong is the new skinny” and I realize this has been going on since CrossFit became a hit and everyone figured “fuck being thin”, let’s get huge and muscular – both men and women. I just have some two cents I would like to share about this particular saying.. and maybe some of you will agree and maybe some of you will disagree and look at it differently, doesn’t matter, this is my opinion and you can either take it or walk away with your own opinion.¬†

 

For one, I will admit, that people have called me both, “skinny”, “lean”, “strong”, “muscular”, so I have been on both sides of this spectrum and to be honest, I don’t consider myself “skinny” by any means (sure growing up, I was), but muscular, sure.. I mean, for a female one may agree I have a muscular body frame – and I am okay with that, judge me if it makes you happy. I particularly don’t find anything wrong with being skinny or being more muscular or perhaps being both, and if that bothers you, well you are on the WRONG blog page.¬†

 

I have lived by: being skinny doesn’t make you weak, and being strong doesn’t mean you can’t be skinny (I know we have this thought that muscular men and women are all bulking looking and have a giant amount of mass) but I know plenty of leaner people who are just as muscular & have strength gains. So, this whole chitter chatter about being skinny is no longer attractive , is bullshit (and yes, this is what that saying means to me) it means we are saying, skinny girls are out and the strong ones are now in (same goes for men). Well I am sorry to be a total douche bag, but before this whole let’s get big and tough happened, we were all saying “fat is not cute” and being skinny makes you attractive — anyone else remember those days? so now, I have taken notice that people on social media seem to making these depressing statements that are basically nailing skinny females (and possibly men) to a wall, saying they are no longer the cool thing and now if you want in the cool crowd, become a stronger person and have abs and have quads that seem more defining… oh gosh much, much more. Well I hate to break it to you, it really isn’t any of your damn business how someone chooses to have their body frame/body image, it never was your business, so if you make it your business, then you are the PROBLEM. We can make our bodies our business and if you choose to be thin and run marathons, cool or if you choose to be muscular and more defining and do bodybuilding, that is cool too! BUT neither one of those physiques is BETTER than the other. Everyone has preferences, doesn’t mean the other side is wrong or ugly, or should be looked down upon. I hate when people talk shit about someone’s else choice of physique, we can’t possibly think that everyone in the world should be the same.¬†

 

This is me saying being strong is not the new skinny, being skinny doesn’t make you weak and you don’t have to choose between the two, just be you! Thanks for reading! feel free to share, comment, like and follow.

 

Your Fitness Blogger,

Shay-lon xxoo

I Am Only Human

Bound By Flaws.

For a first time in a long time.. 

 

It had occur to me that people see me as this “super human” amazing women who lifts heavy and walks with confidence and seemingly has her life together & everything she does just seems to be #goals (my blog, my workout, my future career, my online presence, physique, etc) & this scares me a little bit, actually a lot of bit. I mean granted I am thankful that I have inspired people, built relationships and rapport with people who now trust me enough to come to me with questions about fitness/health, have had a blog that went from 0 to hero in matter of months and that I tend to make people smile with my random comedic personality BUT what scares me is that people seem to think because of all this I did do, that they think they can’t do it. Like it took some magical pixie dust and oops the store ran out of it, so looks like no one else is capable of doing AMAZING things with their own life.¬†

 

I hate to give it to you like this.. BUT.. I am only human. That’s right, I came out the vagina the same way you did and I ended up on planet earth just like you. my baby self didn’t have a 6 pack and big arms, I surely wasn’t tying blogs at the age of 2 and I couldn’t have been that famous because I am still broke & I am willing to bet .. no one really even knows me besides family and friends and the people who know of me¬†online. I could lie and say I am a HUGE deal but lets get real, I am not. Do I want to be? YES! because I have a lot to offer in my field and I know I am capable of GREAT things! I believe this. I know how hard I have to work in order to keep my physique in top notch if I want the “deals” and exposure, I know what it takes to keep my blog running smoothly so that all of you keep coming back to pester me about how much you love my stuff (lol) ¬†& I know how much constant research, learning and events it will take for me to build more knowledge so I know what I am talking about and can teach others and spread my knowledge to others who listen to me. My life is not all daisies and wildflowers with tons of sunshine – I have cloudy days. I have periods and bloating that makes me look “gross” , I have struggled with body shaming, I have had the ups and downs of having a nice physique, I have failed in sporting events, I have struggled with my own self confidence and who I am, I have struggled financially, I have lost out on many opportunities (not being good enough), I have days where my abs are no longer there and my arms look like twigs and I am crying trying to pick myself back up. I have had many days where my post suck and I felt like walking away, and for goodness sake .. I know what it is like to have flaws.¬†

 

The problem is, maybe not all my flaws are seen with the human eye, maybe some of them are seen and you can pinpoint them in less than 5 seconds, but it doesn’t matter because I am no better than anyone else. Being in the fitness field can put a lot of pressure on you to be something like someone else in order to gain a huge following, more “friends”, more money and more fame. I don’t mind the pressure much anymore because I had to stop trying to be like her or him and had to try better at doing what I do best: being me, with flaws and all. I can’t always show my flaws because, hey it is a business, and I have to put on a good face and a good show if I want to keep everyone else around me happy, but when I do, it hits hard — because that is the one time I can let go and just allow myself to cry or get angry. Becoming a trainer isn’t easy either, hell .. you are responsible for someone outside of yourself and being an athlete, well hell you are responsible with being “good” and if not good, then you better be able to handle the harsh criticisms because the world is ready to chew you whole and spit you out. Truth is, during this whole time of learning about myself and wanting to go the distance in everything I do, I have learned I am as strong as I allow but I can’t handle every hurdle and I can’t handle every ball thrown at me.. because like everyone else, I am human and I am going to have days where I fall and getting back up will seem impossible.¬†

 

Hopefully this post gave people some perspective and understanding. Feel free to leave comments, likes, share it on social media or follow me ūüôā Thank you.

 

Your Fitness Blogger,

 

Shay-lon xxooo

 
 
 
 
 
 
 

Pre-judgement zone at the Gym

Your biggest eyes have been used to assume the worst in others” -Shay-lon Moss

Gym 1

So for the past couple of days or so, i have been trying really hard to post different topics on each blog site because I thought that was the “way to go” but then I realized, its probably not the best option because not everyone uses other blogging sites. ¬†For those of you who do not already know this, I have a tumblr, wordpress and google blogger account and so I realized not everyone has each of these like I do so not everyone can see what I post if I post something different on all of them, I want to make it easier for all of you & make my new goal copying all my post from each site onto one another so that EVERYONE sees EVERYTHING. If you do have all three of these or 2/3 of these and follow me.. I will still try to make one of them more or less different if I can but I am focusing on making them all the same so no one misses out. ¬†Below I will post what I posted yesterday on my google blogger & both of them are on tumblr as we speak.

“When one steps inside the gym, he looks to see who is watching”

 

Today I want to talk about “gym judgement”. ¬†For those of you who may not have heard of this phrase it’s because I just made it up. ¬†Gym judgement is when you assume why someone attends the gym, why someone has the body they have, making light of someones bad form but not helping them correct it, making light of your body when know its better than someone else’s, laughing at someone who doesn’t lift as much as you do, making sure eyes are on you when you workout because you want to show off and prejudging everyone in the gym. Guess why I am speaking on this particular topic? because it happens & I have witnessed it the past 3-4 days now at my gym. Now before someone decides to say “everybody passes gym judgement” , you are correct but not everyone does it the same way. ¬†Gym judgement can also be a good thing when it’s used positively. ¬†Which I will explain.

 

Negative gym judgement examples:

 
  • she has cellulite
  • she shouldn’t wear leggings while working out because her legs are flabby
  • who walks the treadmill? seriously.
  • grandma needs to stay home because she obviously can’t move worth a shit
  • this guy is only lifting ______ pounds.. what a joke
  • he/she has bad form, they shouldn’t use the machine if they can’t use it properly
  • he/she comes here everyday, but still manages to be fat
  • that chick is super skinny, she should probably gain some muscle.
  • omg, who wears that to a gym..
  • wearing clothes that show more skin than necessary
  • drawing attention to yourself because you know you “look good”
  • lifting more weight than necessary but not able to use correct form/technique

Now some of these are verbal and others are non verbal ques of gym judgement. It’s making a conscious decision to make light of other people’s flaws while they workout & to puff your head up while you workout to make others around you feel intimidated or uncomfortable. ¬†Its become apparent to me, that three men at my gym have made it pretty clear they enjoy gym judging people. ¬†Actually they say much worse about the people, then I stated above but I choose to not type those words out. Normally their victims are elderly, young girls, young guys, anyone who seems “weak”, “ugly”, or overweight or vulnerable. These three men don’t make light out loud of course but they say things where I can usually hear it if I am near them or enough to make the person walk away & ignore them. ¬†Mind you these men are middle aged men, probably late 30s early 40s.. and its really ridiculous they come to the gym to workout and ridicule others.

 

Positive gym judgement example:

  • Helping someone fix their form/technique and explaining to them why
  • complimenting someone on how well they are doing
  • Taking the time to realize everyone goes to the gym for the same reasons: to workout
  • Wearing appropriate clothing that doesn’t have to show your assets to make a point
  • staying humble but confident enough to do your workout and feel good
  • lifting weight that you know you can lift without destroying your form/technique
  • learning from someone else how to do a certain exercise
  • talking to fellow gym members to understand their reasoning for wanting to workout
  • have a positive attitude
  • don’t compete to show off
  • keep your jokes about people’s appearance to yourself and do not make light of it.
  • ask yourself if that was your grandma would you want someone to talk to her like that? if that was your mom or sister or brother, would you want people to laugh at them?

Again these might not all be something you are interested in, but these are positive ways to attend a gym and get the most out of them. Some of the negatives are also another form of body shaming, and its sad because people want to come to the gym to improve, gain confidence, feel good, socialize, to “get away”, lose weight, gain muscle. ¬†The gym can be someones safe haven but when people tear people down instead of uplifting them, it makes it harder for people to want to go. ¬†I know females can be quite harsh toward other females; when it comes to body and appearance but it needs to stop because at some point you might hit an ultimate low point in your life and trust me you will not want someone to continually tear you down.

 

Maybe some of you may know someone who is negative when they attend the gym or people who make light of others flaws instead of helping them, maybe you are one of these types of people yourself.  We all judge people, I do know this, even I do on a daily basis. but when I pass judgement at the gym, most likely I also try to help that person or put myself in their shoes because I have no idea how that person may feel or handle it, not to mention I never want someone to ever feel uncomfortable around me or intimidated. As for the three men at the gym who seem to enjoy passing negative judgement toward others at the gym, I plan on saying something to them if I hear of it again.

 

All-in-all just be aware of your mindset when you attend a gym and see people of all body types and training levels, keep in mind some people may struggle and that’s when you help and show them the way or maybe find someone who can or just ignore it and focus on yourself if you don’t care. Either way, just make sure you keep your mind open and comments to yourself if you have to be negative.

Thank you for reading, comment, like, follow and share.

 

Sincerely,

Your blogger Shay-lon

Star Wars Actress Attacked- Carrie Fisher

starwars

Star Wars Attack

Star Wars Actress asked to lose 35 pounds

So as we are all aware, the actress who has played “Princess Leia” for the past decade & just recently was also in the newest Star Wars movie has been attacked about her weight; not to mention her age. For those of you who may not know whom this icon is, she is Carrie Fisher. Carrie Fisher has been a legend since the very first Star Wars movie appeared in 1977; she played Princess leia and is known for her beauty and well spoken words on camera.
 
For many, this movie meant so much and stood for so much & brought out the inner kid. ¬†Unfortunately it seems as though some people didn’t like the idea of “Princess Leia” being older, and not so “thin” in their opinion. ¬†People forgot she is not the same person she was YEARS ago, when she was just starting out and young. Some of you, don’t understand how rare it is for such an icon to still be able to do well on screen & manage to hold their character over so many years. ¬†This is a good example of why body shaming is a problem.
 
It seems no one can watch a movie without passing judgement on someone’s body, and or age. ¬†It becomes problematic for those who have grown up watching Star Wars and want to “relive” their childhood dreams. ¬†Why do people have the right to judge someone because of how they look? Who gives us the right to decide how “fat” or “skinny” someone is? Every since when do we have a right to decide what she does with her body & how she carries herself? Freedom of speech gives us a right to an opinion but our opinion shouldn’t be used to bash someone else if they are doing their job by being the best they can be. ¬†This no doubt has played a huge part in the media the past couple of days & the actress seems to be handling the critics well; holding her dignity high, saying what is on her mind and not succumbing to her fans over analyzation of her. ¬†The expectations that we hold on others is quite disturbing to say the least when no one takes time to look at themselves in the mirror and fix that.
 
If anything this shows the lack of happiness in those people’s lives & maybe some of them are insecure with themselves and aim to target others for self gratification. If I am wrong, it could also be the fact we have no filter and choose to express our opinions loudly in hopes it causes some kind of uproar. I would like to think this issue wouldn’t have made a difference in the movie, but it seems like it has for fans and media alike. I wish we wouldn’t be so vain, and aim to criticize petty things that have no effect on our own lives. For the sake of this country, if an actor being “overweight” is going to keep you from enjoying a movie, please feel free to not watch (although in my opinion she looked just fine, and did well throughout the movie) me not being a Star Wars fan. ¬†All-in-all make it a point to keep your negativity to yourself or low key because you may never know when a day comes and someone is not satisfied with the way you look & will pass judgement on you.
 
P.S I have one more topic to talk about below about this same thing.
 
She was asked to lose weight for the sake of the movie, and I call it bullshit. She is forced to lose weight because no one wants to give up their thoughts of the young Carrie Fisher, media is sitting on their high horse once again to appease people that are vain, incompetent and very superficial. We the people who enjoy movies for the movie and good acting could careless about how she looks as long as she remembers her script. ¬†Yes, its true, its an actors job to look the part; but keep in mind she is older than most actors today & this makes a difference in her muscle mass, weight, changes in facial, and hundreds of other things that could forbid her to look like the “young Princess Leia” , take in consideration the fact she is still able to do her part well & entertain the new generation the way she could years back. She did her job, leave her be.
 
Sincerely,
Your Blogger Shay-lon