I Am Only Human

Bound By Flaws.

For a first time in a long time.. 

 

It had occur to me that people see me as this “super human” amazing women who lifts heavy and walks with confidence and seemingly has her life together & everything she does just seems to be #goals (my blog, my workout, my future career, my online presence, physique, etc) & this scares me a little bit, actually a lot of bit. I mean granted I am thankful that I have inspired people, built relationships and rapport with people who now trust me enough to come to me with questions about fitness/health, have had a blog that went from 0 to hero in matter of months and that I tend to make people smile with my random comedic personality BUT what scares me is that people seem to think because of all this I did do, that they think they can’t do it. Like it took some magical pixie dust and oops the store ran out of it, so looks like no one else is capable of doing AMAZING things with their own life. 

 

I hate to give it to you like this.. BUT.. I am only human. That’s right, I came out the vagina the same way you did and I ended up on planet earth just like you. my baby self didn’t have a 6 pack and big arms, I surely wasn’t tying blogs at the age of 2 and I couldn’t have been that famous because I am still broke & I am willing to bet .. no one really even knows me besides family and friends and the people who know of me online. I could lie and say I am a HUGE deal but lets get real, I am not. Do I want to be? YES! because I have a lot to offer in my field and I know I am capable of GREAT things! I believe this. I know how hard I have to work in order to keep my physique in top notch if I want the “deals” and exposure, I know what it takes to keep my blog running smoothly so that all of you keep coming back to pester me about how much you love my stuff (lol)  & I know how much constant research, learning and events it will take for me to build more knowledge so I know what I am talking about and can teach others and spread my knowledge to others who listen to me. My life is not all daisies and wildflowers with tons of sunshine – I have cloudy days. I have periods and bloating that makes me look “gross” , I have struggled with body shaming, I have had the ups and downs of having a nice physique, I have failed in sporting events, I have struggled with my own self confidence and who I am, I have struggled financially, I have lost out on many opportunities (not being good enough), I have days where my abs are no longer there and my arms look like twigs and I am crying trying to pick myself back up. I have had many days where my post suck and I felt like walking away, and for goodness sake .. I know what it is like to have flaws. 

 

The problem is, maybe not all my flaws are seen with the human eye, maybe some of them are seen and you can pinpoint them in less than 5 seconds, but it doesn’t matter because I am no better than anyone else. Being in the fitness field can put a lot of pressure on you to be something like someone else in order to gain a huge following, more “friends”, more money and more fame. I don’t mind the pressure much anymore because I had to stop trying to be like her or him and had to try better at doing what I do best: being me, with flaws and all. I can’t always show my flaws because, hey it is a business, and I have to put on a good face and a good show if I want to keep everyone else around me happy, but when I do, it hits hard — because that is the one time I can let go and just allow myself to cry or get angry. Becoming a trainer isn’t easy either, hell .. you are responsible for someone outside of yourself and being an athlete, well hell you are responsible with being “good” and if not good, then you better be able to handle the harsh criticisms because the world is ready to chew you whole and spit you out. Truth is, during this whole time of learning about myself and wanting to go the distance in everything I do, I have learned I am as strong as I allow but I can’t handle every hurdle and I can’t handle every ball thrown at me.. because like everyone else, I am human and I am going to have days where I fall and getting back up will seem impossible. 

 

Hopefully this post gave people some perspective and understanding. Feel free to leave comments, likes, share it on social media or follow me 🙂 Thank you.

 

Your Fitness Blogger,

 

Shay-lon xxooo

 
 
 
 
 
 
 
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Being a Champion is what happens when the world isn’t looking

champions

Maybe we don’t own trophies to prove it, but we all are champions. Many of you probably think I am crazy for saying so, because what is a champion, if they haven’t won anything, right? This is true,  I mean normally a champion wins something, but when I talk about the word champion, I don’t mean winning a Gold medal or first place trophy, I mean we all do something that makes us a champion. Some of us may not always be champions, sure we make mistakes, we fuck up, we land flat on our faces sometimes and complain about it. It isn’t the fuck up that we should be judged for, it’s what we do after the fuck up that makes most of us champions, it is what we do when doors are closed and no one is watching, it is the smile you put on someone’s face without trying, it is the dollar you gave without asking them why, it is the drive you make in order to see a loved one, it is the gift you bought while you were struggling, it is the courage you had when the world was against you, it is the change you made to save your marriage, it’s the story you told to spread awareness, it is the life you saved without mentioning, it is the fight you gave during your battle of cancer, it is the tears you cried watching a loved one die, it is the promise you kept when everything fell apart, is the friendship you gave someone, the last dollar in your pocket you spent on someone else, the last goodbye, etc. 

 

See, athletes are used to being champions in front of a large crowd,  I would know, I was an athlete all my life, we are used to being applauded for our wins, our triumphs, our records, our pristine smile in front of cameras. The world calls you a good person, the world thinks of you being a good role model, being a good child, a good sibling, a good parent all BECAUSE you do a good job at your event or sport. God forbid you are a horrible at your event and/or sport, now the world will think of you as a loser, you suck, we don’t care about you, now your smile is meaningless, your parenting skills go unseen and you no longer have their attention. The sad fact is we all want to be validated for something good we have done, we look for someone to tell us “good job”, “you are awesome”, “that was amazing”, “I want to be just like you when I grow up”, etc. because we put on this face in front of people and make people believe that what we do in the light is what we do in the dark.  O.J Simpson is a good example of this, he was an amazing athlete during his time and people loved and adored him, all of a sudden his wife is murdered and he faces trial and no one wants to believe he killed her because he was a “good” person on camera, during games, at practice, at the park with his son, so how could he kill his wife? He was made out to be this teddy bear and lovable person, but what he did behind closed doors, the camera couldn’t see.  He knew what he did behind closed doors and he knew what the public seen of him, he chose to make bad decisions (in my opinion) behind closed doors, therefore he is a fraud; he only made good decisions when he got something out of it. This is no different than talking badly about a friend of yours then going to hang out with this same person after talking bad about him/her; you’re fraud because your actions done in the light don’t match what is done in the dark. 

 

I am not saying we don’t make mistakes, because we do and we all have a past. The difference is some people change in order to do better, and some people stay complacent. The world only sees what we show, what we don’t show is what makes someone a champion if it is the right thing to do. You don’t need lights, camera, action to be a champion, you don’t need a trophy, a medal, a certificate, or tons of friends, all you need is a good heart and good intentions. “What you do in the dark will come to light when you least expect it” -Shay-lon Moss

 
 

Guest post: PoojaG (blogging & Niches)

Hello Everyone, I would have said good night, but I don’t want anyone to fall asleep to this post. LOL. 

No original piece today from me, I have a special guest. 

I’ve met PoojaG months ago, I enjoyed her post because of her positive vibes, good character and friendly demeanor, not to mention the fact I have come to find out we have more in common than I would have ever thought. She has been one of my more supportive followers who has essentially been able to share feedback, ideas, advice and inspiration for both myself and her readers. I appreciate her quality of work and all her content, it is because of her content that I had asked her if she would be available to do a guest post for my blog, I thought this particular topic would come natural to her & I was right! she did an amazing job with this piece and I hope it helps beginner bloggers as well as those who want to venture out and write. 

Some of you may have a difference of opinion on this subject matter, but I believe it is important as a blogger and writer to explore your options in the beginning to decide what niche you want to take on and put on display for others to read, watch, look at, etc. I find that I was a rare breed and kind of knew what I wanted to write about because of being in the profession/field, but many writers/bloggers don’t necessary know and sometimes it can be overwhelming to try to figure out what to write about and why and how to catch someone’s attention. No one’s topic is better than any other, some are more “popular” than others but honestly, those tend to be harder to write about because most people already have made their opinions on it before taking a look at your work. I know in fact that when I see how many people on WordPress write about Fitness/health, that I am not the only one and indeed many people probably already have speculation in what I will write about because they have read many other blogs whom speak on the same topics. I know my niche is Fitness/health and one point I wanted to have multiple niches, but decided it would be just as easy to focus on one and hope for the best. Many times it is those who step outside the box that reap the benefits and I have to admit that PoojaG certainly reaped the benefits and successfully made a blog page that entertain more than 1 niche. 

Please give PoojaG a warm welcome, as she shares her take on having a blog page dedicated to more than one niche:

Starting And Managing A Blog That Incorporates Multiple Topics

The reason most people start a blog is because they have something to share with the world whether it’s art, writing, photography, pictures of your cat or something else. And if you are one of those people who want to have a blog which includes more than one topic this post is for you.

When I first began my blog I was absolutely obsessed with psychology (which I still am) and I knew I wanted to write about psychology. However after I started writing about psychology as fun as it was I started reading other people’s blogs that were about other things and I started wanting to blog about other hobbies and interests of mine. So along with writing about psychology I started writing some book reviews and got a pretty good response. Then I started writing poetry again and decided to share some of it with my followers and I got an awesome response. Along the way I decided that I didn’t want to have a blog about just one particular topic (psychology) but I also didn’t want my blog to be a mess and I wanted my followers to know what to expect from my blog. I knew I wanted to do something inspirational so I decided to do motivational Monday and I knew I wanted to write poetry so I decided to write that every Friday. However, I also wanted to write about a bunch of other topics as well as let my readers know what was going on with me but I knew I didn’t have time to blog every day so I left Wednesday open to write whatever I felt like that week. 

My advice if you’re just starting out a blog is that don’t put too much on your plate and don’t take on too much. Don’t start out by writing every day but instead take it slowly. Even if you know exactly what you want to write about because over time there will be changes on your blog which is inevitable. You will start reading other people’s blogs and get some amazing ideas for your own blog plus you might want to blog about other topics than what you planned so leave some days open to write about other things.

Also if you know you are going to blog about multiple topics when you start out remember to keep your blog neat. Don’t write random topics on random days even though doing that sounds a lot more appealing especially when you’re a lazy person like I am. Make sure you allocate a certain day for a certain topic and one or two days to random topics you may want to talk about that week. This way your followers will know what to expect on certain days instead of always being lost. Unlike blogs with only one topic you also need to have a bunch of categories to make it easier to for the reader to find exactly what they are looking for instead of being lost and giving up on your blog.

Another thing you should remember when you have multiple topics on your blog is that it is harder to keep up with than a blog dealing with just one. Not only should you be regular with all the topics you choose to write about but you also need to make sure you spend enough time perfecting each of them. Remember not to spend too much time on just one topic and neglect another because your readers will notice. Plus make sure you follow other blogs with similar topics to just kind of get ideas and motivation. And in my opinion just follow as many blogs as you can whether they have similar topics or not. As long as you’re interested in their blog follow it because you never know you may end up learning a lot from them.

 

I definitely think there can be blogs with too many topics/niches. Even though I think it’s a great idea to have a lot of different topics on your blog sometimes however people do end up having way too many and can’t handle it themselves. I think have as many topics as you can handle rather than having a lot but then messing them up.

I think the biggest advantage of writing a blog with multiple topics is that you don’t limit yourself to just one thing in particular but rather your blog is more open to a bunch of different ideas and topics. I think it’s perfect for someone who isn’t totally sure what they want to write about and want to try out a bunch of different things. It’s also great for someone who wants to write about a bunch of different things but doesn’t want to start more than one blog. It’s great for someone who, like me, is a little indecisive and wants to share a lot of interests on one blog and wants to add different ideas or topics each week.

I think the hardest part is that unlike blogs focused on a single topic, blogs with multiple topics have to post more often if they want to cover all the topics and I’ll admit it does take quite a bit of effort and it does sometimes feel like a bit of work. When you have just one topic you can post as often as every day or as scarcely as once a week but when you have many topics you have to post at least twice a week so no topic is neglected.

Plus when you have a blog covering many things you are bound to get some negative comments. What I personally do is ignore the really harsh ones and reply to the ones which give you some negative criticism.

I don’t think having a blog with just one topic has ever crossed my mind since I started the blog. Like I said before I did start it wanting to write mainly about psychology but even then I knew I would eventually write about other things too depending on what kind of response it got. Now that I have the perfect routine for now where I blog three times a week I really don’t think about changing my blog and making it about just one topic because it would never work for me. I think for a blog like mine having a certain day for each topic works out great and also gives me some time to write and edit.

So, this was my first guest post and I really hope everyone enjoyed it and I just want to really thank Shay-lon for giving me this opportunity. I really love her blog and writing on it is such an amazing chance for me! It would be awesome if you took some time to also check out my blog called lifesfinewhine and if you liked reading this post don’t forget to like it, share it and let us know your thoughts in the comments below!