26 compared to 25. (Motivation Monday)

It’s probably fair to assume that since turning 26 on Thursday March 22nd, I have looked back on my life & everything that has changed (my goals, my maturity level, my growth, my career goals, my morals, my circle of friends, etc) some of the changes haven’t been big, but gradual over the course of the years and other changes, I made right away because it was “time”; time to develop myself and strive for new goals for myself. Goals that would challenge me and that could be accomplished by the time I reach 27 of next year. 

To begin with, I believe the big change in my life since turning 26 is my maturity level and level of understanding myself, this doesn’t mean that I won’t have fun at 26 or will live life “seriously” every given day; it means I have new priorities and obligations that mean more to me this year to have accomplished than it did the previous years. It means when I tell myself I want to do something — I will do it, because I am getting older and time is of the essence; and it means I am going to focus on my prospering my life a whole lot more. The fun will be there; the living life to the fullest won’t disappear, but the journey will be more focused and more dedicated than before. The “understanding myself” part is the time I have taken to clear my mind of the past mistakes and opening my mind to what it means to be happy within myself, finding ways to conquer my bad days, humbling myself in order to create a better circle of people who surround me, taking time to “treat” myself, putting myself first, getting to know my flaws & learning to better myself in all areas of my life one step at a time. All of these things about understanding who I am, is going to take time & won’t come fast but it shows I have progressed when I can see changes in myself that make me happy. 

 

My career goals, have pretty much stayed the same but with a addition of things that will help fulfill my life & add more fun to my goals — keep me on my feet but not overwhelm me with stress. Of course these goals will also take some learning on my part and some networking and possibly even more sacrifices — in the beginning, I wasn’t prepared for this, but now I feel I am more prepared because I see what I do on a daily basis and realize I have to have balance in my life to achieve my success — I have to work harder with more effort but not work harder and stressed. That’s a huge change I am making for myself, learning to find ways to cope with overwhelming amounts of stress (stress won’t disappear, because I know it happens) but instead of shutting down; I want to work through it and find my “coping ways” so that I can live a more positive lifestyle. My career choices will be stressful in the beginning because it will be a whirlwind of emotions and dedication — but in the end, I want it to be fun and take my breathe away every time.

 

Friendships & family members. I have decided that I won’t chase after people in order to keep them close. I will make better efforts to keep in contact with close friends and mend relationships that might need mending and I will eliminate any negativity that keeps me from thriving. I will be happy for those who succeed in life and hope that when I progress, they will be happy for me. I will stay humbled, no matter how far I come, because I won’t forget where I started and who helped me to get there when I needed the boost of motivation — that’s really important, staying humble. I am going to make new friendships but be picky in choosing my friends, I will not allow family to keep me from being who I want to be in this world because it might not fit their dream. I have decided that if you want to be in my life for the long haul, then I won’t have to ask, because I will know 🙂 My friends and family I love dearly and always will, but with love doesn’t mean I have to stop going for what I want for myself, it means they should be my biggest fans and always support me through and through and if I should fall, they will be the people who I can cry on & the same people who tell me to get back up and keep going. 

 

My physical well-being. I am transforming my body to new heights, I am becoming stronger and more willing to push myself past limits that before I was too scared to try. My physique is showing changes — some I enjoy and some I do not, but with my continued fight to accept myself, I will keep training and continue to make this a trial and error situation until I find the right balance with my body and diet. I will also take more care of my skin, my hair, my outer appearance because I want to feel good and look good. 

 

Mentality — My mental state will need work, because I have anxiety and mild forms of depression at times, but I have come a long way in handling these two things and also, have found new forms of better managing them without having to take medication (I refuse to take medication, never have) so I want to keep my mental state in check and make sure that on my off days, I really take the proper “me” time. I have also decided after talking to a friend to start up writing in a journal (keeping a diary of everything each day); I used to do this but stopped last year during my break up with an ex, but I enjoyed doing it, so want to give it a go again. My body dysphoria (lack of seeing myself the way others view my body) is ongoing battle as well but I am learning to look at myself and not nit pick everything. It won’t go away, but it does have it moments where it isn’t as bad. Thankfully having an encouraging circle helps soften my blows to myself. 

 

Goals — life goals will be ever changing because I have many of them and some that I want to do before 27 and others I want to do before dying. I plan on writing them all down and checking them off. Some of the goals will be with friends and others will be done on my own but either way, I want to stay motivated and having goals will help with that, but I won’t allow myself to become upset if I shouldn’t make them in a deadline because shit happens. 

 

Financially stable. I have reached a point in my life where finances are becoming more and more important; I can’t rely on money falling from the sky, so I have to work to keep myself responsible for my lifestyle choices. While being rich would be nice, I aim to be more comfortable and to live a less lavish lifestyle and more minimal way of spending money. I will spend money on travels, food, shelter and for memories that I can keep, I will buy clothes when necessary and new shoes when needed, and will continue to spend money on loved ones on special occasions.  I won’t allow myself to go broke in order to keep up with the “Jones”, and I won’t allow myself to feel obligated to buy things for a few compliments. Taking care of myself, that will be important, making sure I can pay on credit cards, being sure I can afford groceries and living circumstances, being sure that I can afford having a social life with friends, being sure I can afford my needs — that is important to me. There was a time when affording materialistic things in order to “fit in” mattered to me, but after growing up and realizing most people don’t give a shit and realizing that I have no business trying to impress someone who is superficial in the first place — I am going to spend my money more responsibly so that in the end, I have savings, I have emergency funds and have a better grip on my finances. I began this process by cutting up all my credit cards. 

 

Dating — If I am being honest, I am single and currently not in any rush to jump into a new relationship. I am  over my ex, but not yet ready to share my life with someone because I have things I want to do on my own for the time being BUT I am open to dating and meeting people. I even started talking to someone but was upfront on my intentions. We both agreed if we end up together — awesome but if not, then we are totally okay with having a fantastic friendship — right now I enjoy their company and they enjoy mine, we have some great conversations and share many personal things with one another. I find that this time around, I know what I look for in a potential partner and have also opened my mind to other things about people that I was blinded to in the beginning because of my superficial thoughts. Wherever this road takes me, I don’t know, but for now I am enjoying myself and this is important because I want to be happy alone before adding someone to my life. 


Athlete — being an athlete is my job and hobby, it’s my thrill and stress, my fun and competition. I love it, and my continued goals of competing and influencing others to be their best self in whatever they do is ongoing. I have been sponsored by companies, have been lifting since may 2016 and will be competing in powerlifting and will then broaden my horizon in other fitness industry sports so that I am well rounded and can offer more help when training my clients and growing my business. 

In becoming an athlete and growing my social media platforms, I have found where I need work when it comes to my own lifts and where I want to grow mentally and physically. This is part of who I am and who I choose to be, I don’t need fame to make me relevant within the industry, having made my own path and working towards growing my brand — I hope my athletic ability will motivate others to be reckless, kick ass and smile every chance they get when they want to better themselves in their sports. I want my brand to be about confidence, humbled experiences and thriving from positive people. xo 



Of course there are many other aspects to my life that I feel are important == but to keep this post short and sweet, those aspects I won’t mention at this time. I believe where my life is now, is not where I want it to be next year, I want it to be bigger, better and have more achievements. I know today is Monday, and what better way to spend it than to start this new journey at 26 now. I have a book I want to write, actually two books I want to write, so that will be a whole other addition to my goals that I want to accomplish. 26 never felt so inspiring, but I am thrilled to get this path started! 

 

Thanks for reading, hopefully all of you enjoyed this read. Feel free to leave comments, share and follow my blog. 

 

Shay-lon 

 
 
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Birthday Weekend Recap

I finally turned the big 26 on Thursday (3-22-18) and wanted to share how fun the experience was this year to be around different people and share moments/memories. I don’t typically have the chance to take a  bunch of pictures when I am celebrating, but I love writing about it because this is my way of keeping them alive. 

 

Thursday was the start of my birthday and it was a huge surprise to have my mom come to the gym with a cake to wish me a happy birthday. I also, got to spend it with a few gym friends during a workout. I also went out of town to meet up with a friend and she bought me dinner for my bday 🙂

 

Friday- I worked all day, but a friend came down to spend the weekend with me from out of town, that was wonderful. 

 

Saturday- I had a dinner get together at Texas Roadhouse with friends and family members, the food was good and we shared some fun conversation. After dinner, my friend and I got invited to go out of town and to some local bars — we drove a hour away to her friend’s house and then made some stops to pick others up and headed to some bars. I didn’t get drunk by any means, but that was fine by me, I danced and had some shots and just enjoyed what life had to offer me. We got home around 2 in the morning and I had to work the next morning, so we fell right to sleep. 

 

Sunday- I woke up in pain and it sucked, I had to call off work for the first time since working for the company for 5 years in April (this April), it wasn’t planned this way, but thankfully my job understood my health condition and allowed me the day off. I slept all day pretty much, but when I woke up I tried to have something to eat and played some board games with my friend for a while & then shared some conversation and they left later that night. 

 

Overall my birthday weekend was everything I could imagine at turning 26, and I am happy I was so involved with people — I want to do a special thank you to everyone who wished me a happy birthday on all my social media platforms, I definitely feel blessed! 

 

-Shay-lon

Good news with a cherry on top

If you are on my Facebook, you probably already know the good news… 

 

But many of you are not, so I have some positive news to share with my fellow readers .. 

 

Today was an overall good day, after my workout this morning, I had to train a client and then I had to work the front counter til 8pm at the gym but many things happened today that made me smile and many things have happened since today, that have enlightened my life since working at the gym and also since meeting new people and making new friendships, so I will share what I shared on FB with all of you. 

 
 
  1. Trained my client this afternoon and just love her as a person, she just has a wonderful heart and does so well 😀
  2. I had someone from the gym tonight bring me tamales, the sweetest and both of her sons are just so awesome.. the one hugged me and I always feel like family to them. I so appreciate it ❤
  3. I might have some new clients to train, possibly a couple… and that’s exciting because they seem eager and I hope if anything, I hope can raise their self esteem and give them something to look forward to when they arrive in the gym regardless if I’m their trainer or not… I always aim to build people up.. because I want people to feel like they belong and feel good about themselves because I know the feeling of low self esteem and wanting to give up and I hope everyone I train and help I make them feel empowered and cared about. I always tell people I believe in them, because if nobody else does, I want them to know I do! 
  4. I’ve made some great friendships and people who have been amazing toward me in and out of the gym, just your hello and a high five puts a smile on my face and I love you guys. I appreciate those who have always encouraged me in my lifting and encouraged me to be my best self, thank you
  5. the awesome instructor and a few ladies invited me out in the next few weeks for my birthday and I just feel like it definitely means something, I appreciate them
  6. I tell ya, this dentist who comes into my gym, he is so funny and just down to earth and humble. His conversations have always been a learning experience and something to look forward to, I love it.
  7. I talk too much and never get out of the gym on time, lol

I also want to thank all of you who take the time to follow, read and share my blog among your peers, whom have taken the time to leave comments and share conversations with me on social media. I have been blogging for a little over 2 years now and it feels like a lifetime because I have met some wonderful and skillful bloggers — people who have transformed since day one of following them and have seen me transform since day one of following me. To watch your growth as writers has been an absolute honor and I look forward to many more years of watching and being apart of your experience. Blogging has become second nature to me, a second full time hobby and job, I take it seriously and share my life (good and bad) with all of you because I want to be real and want to show my own growth, my own stumbles and my own get up moments. As bloggers, it gets easy getting caught up in the stats and wanting to have the most viewers and followers, etc. & that stuff is all fine and dandy, but for me, it means more when I develop relationships/bonds with people who read my content. I have fallen behind on post, have made changes to the blog, and have fallen short on quality of post at times, but it never ceases to amaze me how many of you continue to be there no matter. I appreciate all of you and wish all of you the best with your continued writing and may we continue to build friendships and share laughs with one another for the next many years ahead of us ❤ 

—– Shay- lon 

Building a positive social circle

I plan on getting back to the podcast soon that I created (been away from it for 3 months) and so to keep things fresh, I will probably do the Tips Tuesday — and gradually get back into things, don’t want to overwhelm myself with too much because of all the extra stuff I am now taking on. With this being said, I created this tip months ago, and I figured it is very important — something we should all aim for & that is:

 

Building a positive social circle.

 

What this means, is choosing to surround yourself with people who help to build you, motivate you, encourage you, and support you. We all have had people in our circle at one point who seemed like the debbie downer or the one that constantly complains about life and all the downs but never sees any positive things from it — but maybe some of us have been the negative one in our own circle (if this is true, change your outlook .. in order to gain the positive circle you seek). This is excluding those of us with mental illnesses that might play a part in our mindset, but even so with that illness, finding people who appreciate you and give you hope and have a concern for you and your life as much as you have for them is a start in the right direction. 

 

I am not perfect by any means, but since growing up and becoming more mature and making better adult decisions, I have gotten better at being alone until I meet people who have a good impact in my life instead of being friends and accepting everyone in my circle — I had to learn to be more picky because I get discouraged easy and I deal with my own demons and having a negative person who constantly brings me down, only creates more issues in the long term for me. Something we have to learn to do, is be picky as to who we allow in our lives and who we allow to impact our lives. Down below I list some ways to build a positive social circle:

 
 
  1. Be PICKY! Don’t allow anyone in, make sound decisions. Not everyone needs to be your friend
  2. Change your outlook/attitude about yourself – when you have a more positive outlook on yourself, people tend to gravitate towards you and in turn you make more relationships that are good relationships
  3. Respect people- Respect goes a long way in life, if you can respect others, normally it means they will have mutual respect for you
  4. Be open minded: Open minded individuals tend to see within a person vs the outer layer, they want a deeper connection with someone and in turn you truly start to build a stronger bond
  5. Compliment someone: Giving someone a reason to smile can make a difference — people will feel appreciated & it can make your day knowing you made someone else’s day. People enjoy compliments, truths about themselves that maybe they don’t see within them, but hearing it from someone else gives them a reason to continue being awesome! A simple compliment can carry a lot of weight
  6. Don’t be self absorbed: I always say there is nothing wrong with taking care of yourself BUT you don’t want your circle to get tired of learning about you, when you become self absorbed everything revolves around you and that shows others that you don’t have their best interest in mind. I will just add that, being self absorbed can lead to bad relationships because everybody wants a chance to shine and when you take someone’s limelight to shine back on yourself, it comes off as arrogant. 
  7. Confidence is needed: Confidence is a necessity because people feed off someone who is confident with who they are, you need to carry yourself like you are proud of being alive, proud of who you are and proud of where you came from because it is what makes you, you! You might have a bad past but it doesn’t mean you are bad person, and you might have flaws but flaws don’t make you less of a person. 
  8. Think before you speak: We get in a habit with saying whatever is on our minds, which isn’t always bad, but it can lead to bad outcomes if we don’t think about how to go about things. If you keep other people’s feelings in mind, then you will have better outcomes, telling the truth isn’t bad but its how you say it that can make the whole difference. Take others into consideration before speaking too much of your mind. 
  9. Don’t be “two faced”: We all know what it means to be two faced “someone who smiles in your face but will talk behind your back when you leave” , yes, that’s very dishonest, rude and immature. Grow up, if you want people in your circle who are positive, don’t make it hard on yourself by giving them a reason to not trust you or like you. 
  10. Find people with similar hobbies: It can pay off when you acquaint yourself with those who share the same interest and hobbies as you, this makes life a little easier but don’t disregard those who are opposite because many times they can give us new experiences and allow us to step outside our comfort level. 
  11. Be true to SELF: Be real, be authentic, and be yourself. Changing for others will either end badly or last for a short period of time because you will run into all walks of life and having to shift who you are for each person will get tiring — change is good if it makes you into a better person and develops you mentally and physically and spiritually but when it becomes a change in order to “fit in” with people or groups of people, it drains you, overwhelms you, and reduces your chances of making deeper connections with people. Not everyone will like you, but those who do like you, will be worth it because they will see the best in you — 
 

Building a circle isn’t about being “popular” and most liked, it is about building a meaningful bond with people who take the time to build that same bond with you. Building a positive circle isn’t about having to smile and be happy everyday, it’s about building a circle that allows for bad days but doesn’t dwell on them — Shay-lon Moss 

 

A circle can be small (2-3 close friends) or a bigger circle (5-10 friends), or your family members — it doesn’t matter how big or small it is, it’s a circle that has your back no matter how deep the water gets; they motivate, support, and uplift you– they give you truths but don’t slam you with bad vibes — Shay-lon Moss

 

Have something you want to add to this list, feel free to leave in the comment section! 

Long Leg Day

I would just like to mention that today’s leg day was written down a lot harder than what I got finished within 3 hours. I know it seems like a long day, but that includes the breaks, because this week is all heavy lifting, which means longer rest periods. I don’t ever plan on being at a gym for more than 1 hour, but since training for powerlifting, I have been inside a gym no less than 2 hours .. which probably is normal depending on your fitness level and your workouts. I know many days I have a cardio and lift that (so take that into consideration) most lifters don’t like doing their cardio on the same days as lifting. I am an odd ball and so far have been able to handle it. I will also mention that some days I have a gym partner (now); I guess that is what happens when you make new friends at the gym, they then decide it would be cool to lift with you and thank goodness she lifts just as much or heavier than me.. so it hasn’t been bad at all, considering I am usually a lone wolf when I workout and I liked it. Many times my workout sets or reps get cut because she wants to shorten the gym period but very rarely will I be doing that because we have different goals in mind and I need to focus on my overall goal  to put it lightly. Regardless, it has been nice to have a gym partner every once in a while to keep me motivated and help spot me. 

 
 
  • barbell back squat: 

 

  • 75% of 90% of my 1-RM: 3 x 5, 135 lb
  • 85% of 90% of my 1-RM: 3 x 3, 155 lb
  • 95% of my 90% of my 1-RM: 3 x 1, 170 lb
  • 95% of my true 1-RM (singles): 3 x 1, 190 lb

 

  • Jump squats: 2 x 25-30 seconds
  • leg press: 5 x 20, 208 lb
  • DB goblet squats: 3 x 15, 25 lb
  • Barbell front squats: 3 x 10, 6, 12, 95 lb, 55 lb

P.S I also implemented foam rolling and stretching along with my warm up in the beginning of my workout — yay 🙂

 

Merry Belated Christmas|Day after Christmas

I hope all of you had a wonderful Christmas Eve & Christmas Day! Sorry I had been away from the blog world since Monday, I have been fairly busy because of the holidays —- which I consider a good thing, but this now means hopefully things will be dying down and I can get back to blogging regularly. With New Years on its way, I suppose we are preparing for 2018.

 

I would love for my readers/bloggers to answer a few questions?

 
 
  1. Do you have any New Year’s resolutions?
  2. What is your day after Christmas like?
  3. What is one gift that you enjoyed the most from Christmas?
  4. Do you like listening to Christmas tunes?
  5. Did you eat better this year vs the previous year (i.e healthier, more portioned out, etc.) 
  6. What is your favorite Christmas movie?

Leave all your answers in the comment section! feel free to share this post among your peers so that they can answer as well!

 

Fitness WonderWoman,

Shay-lon