What makes for a good gym partner?

Some people are ‘lone wolves’ such as myself, but every now and then we want the encouragement of someone else to keep us pumped, grow a bond & be the ‘bro’ we need in order to hit that next PR (yelling in our ear and rooting for our success)! 

 

But.. 

 

We should be picking about who we choose to be that “bro” and that friend we call on because it does make all the difference. Down below I highlight some tips to look for when searching for a gym partner who benefits you & vice versa. 

 
 
  1. You need to choose someone who has a personality that meshes well with yours
  2. Choose someone who is close to your fitness level — unless you don’t mind playing teacher/coach (some people find that annoying)
  3. Find someone who commits to the gym as much as yourself or more so that you can count of them for the long term. 
  4. If they don’t push you to do better, don’t challenge you to excel then they aren’t a person who will benefit you. 
  5. Find a person whose schedule can work along with yours — or find a compromise you are both willing to do
  6. Choose someone who doesn’t ‘yap’ all day, but knows when to focus on the grind while at the gym — you are there for results not for a social party
  7. Choose a gym partner that keeps you accountable
  8. Choose someone that doesn’t have a huge ego, you don’t want someone that’s there to show off their gains, you want someone who compliments your gains but also confident with themselves without having to be flashing
  9. Choose someone who is open minded- because when choosing a program for yourself or the both of you, you need someone who is willing to give something a go, unless they seek different results, but not someone who talks down about your decisions *but offering advice is fine*
  10. A know it all, doesn’t always know it ALL. Choose someone who doesn’t treat you like a test subject, they might know their bodies but it doesn’t mean they know yours and unless you hire them for training you, don’t allow someone to make you feel stupid or incompetent. There are coaches with experience and degrees that can offer that type of support. If your gym partner is coming off like a ‘know it ALL’ then they are too involved with being right than being a friend & that will get old real fast. 

Thanks for reading, I hope these tips are helpful for when you are in search of a gym partner! please feel free to follow, share, comment and like 😀

 

Be sure to also follow me on social media where you can see videos, photos and tips involving being fit & healthy.

 

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For more advice and Tips, click Here & here

 

Shay-lon 

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BEGREATGUYS — Don’t rely on someone

Save some of your motivation from within. 

 

We all need a little bit of a boost to keep going – to know we are headed in the right direction — to keep us accountable — to make us feel good about how far we have come. 

Indeed all of this is true, and I believe having a partner in crime that keeps you focused and disciplined and makes it possible for you to keep going is a great opportunity and needed — because social support is important. On the other hand, relying on your partner in crime, in order to succeed might weigh you down long-term and keep you from exploring outside your comfort level — or prohibit you from taking a leap of faith.  I think too much of a good thing, is just that, too much of a good thing. We need someone to keep us grounded, but when that someone backs down after awhile, we need to know how to use what we have within to keep up from giving up. 

 
 

As a personal trainer, i like to think it is my job to be a cheerleader, role model, knowledgeable professional in the field of fitness/health and an accountability partner that creates workouts and talks to you about what specifically will get you from point A to point B. I love my job and I love that I can build people inside & contribute to their physical changes that make them feel good. I just wonder sometimes if people whom rely on their trainers, realize that at some point, it will be time for you to leave the nest and utilize all the teachings so that you become independent at the gym. Now, I am not against having a long term client because everyone meets their goals at different lengths of time & everyone’s goals are different how they go about them BUT at the same time, when I am relied on, I don’t want it to be so that when and if I go on vacation; my client decides to quit working out until I return. I want my clients to be self sufficient enough that if I should be gone for a short period of time, they can manage on their own. It’s profitable to have a client rely on me, but it doesn’t make me look good when I have a client for years who has yet to reach any of their goals or who has yet to be able to gain enough confidence to workout without me being physically there every waking moment. I don’t want to kick my clients to the curb but I want to know that they are growing independently, building self esteem, and maintaining their success in the process of having me train them & I know it will take time. 


But not only from a trainer perspective but also from a friend/neighbor/spouse/family, etc perspective… 

We shouldn’t allow these people to feel so pressured. Having a friend who comes to the gym with you is fun, motivating and keeps you on your feet but what happens when that person misses a few days? Normally, the first thought is to stop going for a few days as well because you don’t want to workout without them. The motivation you have stems from being able to workout with your friend, so when a friend misses a day or two, that becomes your excuse for missing a day or two. Basically when you realize you aren’t meeting your goals and aren’t seeing results, the blame will fall on your friend because in your mind, because your friend missed a few days– you weren’t able to meet the requirements it takes to meet your goals. Not saying you will legitimately blame them to their face, but when someone ask why haven’t you been attending the gym anymore; it will fall back on your friend — “I normally come when my friend comes, and he hasn’t been able to make it back in so when he feels better or starts back on his normal routine, we will be back”. Nobody should take the blame for your lack of choice to do something, because when it comes down to it, you have the time and the reason for wanting to workout– but you have co-depended on someone for so long in order to workout that when it comes time to come on your own, it’s too intimidating & you make them the excuse. 


When you want something bad enough… 

It should come from within, it should fuel you enough to start and to finish. Having an extra person to root for you is good, but sometimes people don’t root and don’t support, so you have to be prepared to conquer things on your own. Prepare to endure many things on your own, so that if the time should come where you lose that partner in crime or lose that support — it doesn’t prohibit you from continuing on your journey. Life doesn’t always play fair and in order to make the best of the lemons thrown at us, we need to rely on ourselves for the most strength. I am a firm believer that having social support is a wonderful thing, but I stand by that people can either bring you up or weigh you down; you have to stay in control of yourself and not allow someone else to be your driver. 


Anybody can play backseat driver to our choices, but you are the one driving, so the only person who can control your steering wheel is you” — Shay-lon Moss

Thanks for reading! follow, share, comment and like. 


Be sure to follow me on social media — instagram, FB & Twitter 🙂

When the Bench Press Needs Work

Ugh! my bench , my bench, my bench needs improvement. Today was a heavier day for bench — what i could consider heavier but not near my max day. I was working in the 3 rep range and did 95 lbs & 110 lb lifts for my bench press. I show both lifts Here. My bench has always been my weakest lift out of the BIG 3  — I am hoping within the next couple of weeks my max will increase by 5 lbs or so, because when competing I have to be strong in all three lifts in order to get the better total. My deadlifts and squats are my strongest lifts but I can’t only rely on them so I HAVE to work on increasing my bench if I want to better myself as a powerlifter. 

 

As of now, my plan is to use weighted push ups & continue to work on my weaker areas that carry over to the bench in order to have a good balance of strength & hopefully seeing increases in my bench press. 

 

Warm up:

 
  • Resistance band chest press: 4 x 25, green band
  • EZ military press: 4 x 25, 20 lbs
  • Lat pulldowns: 4 x 25, 30 lbs

Workout:

  • Barbell bench press: 6 x 3, 95 lbs (75% 1RM)
  • barbell bench press: 6 x 3. 100 lbs (80% 1RM)

Superset:

  • Seated Arnold press: 5 x 6, 50 lbs
  • DB front raises: 5 x 6, 30 lbs

Tri-set:

  • Cable upright rows: 5 x 6, 80 lbs
  • DB hammer curls: 5 x 6, 60 lbs & 70 lbs
  • DB triceps kickback: 5 x 6, 20 lbs

Superset:

  • EZ bar curls: 5 x 6, 50 lbs
  • Seated DB shoulder press: 5 x 6, 50 lbs

Thanks for reading – don’t forget to follow me on social media

 
 

Remember to follow my blog, share it, and leave comments 🙂

 

Shay-lon

Sometimes I feel like I am drowning —

Hey everyone 🙂

With as busy as I have been, I know I haven’t been consistent with my post like I was in the past and that is because I am building a new website for my personal training business I want to do & I have been traveling and out of town a whole lot more since it is the summer. 

Not to mention, I want to start up a new podcast for my business but it will be fun and lot more laid back — but coming up with a title has been grueling, so hopefully within the month that will be a  finished product. I have had a lot on my plate with this new business venture I am taking and being sponsored by two companies and having an online presence on IG, FB and Twitter, etc has been taking a toll sometimes — it can be quite overwhelming and I am always on the go, go, go. There is hardly enough time for me to just do me *hints why I am usually gone for a long period of time from this blog*. I ma not trying to avoid any of you or make excuses for my absence but at times I need that breath of fresh air & not always will I post it. 

With all of this being said, I have yet to sit down and come up with a new schedule for this blog and my LGBTQ blog — so be patient with me, but do know I will  and when I do, I will let all of you know, because I know many of you like routine and enjoyed my older days when I was posting more often and with new, fun and exciting things that led you to my blog in the first place. Nothing comes easy when you have a lot on your plate on and offline — so this might be something that ends up being trial and error until I get it right. Once upon a time, I was keeping track of all my milestones when it came to followers on this blog, but since slowing down and realizing I am not dedicating the same amount of time I once was to this blog I found there was no point in doing all of that when my stats reflect my failure to commit to consistency; maybe in the future I will have new milestones I can reflect on and share but for now don’t expect anything HUGE until I have been a more regular blogger again. I am not giving up blogging or letting go of this blog or any of the other blogs I do, they are all successful blogs that I will make into a side profession, but the amount of time I am dedicating to them will be hindered quite a bit for sometime until I can get more things off my plate and have a balance — especially since I am making a website, that will need my full attention as well. I was always told to not break off more than I can chew (I suppose that is too late, considering circumstances) but I can still find ways to manage my blogs without them becoming a chore ( I don’t like chores) LOL.

In the meantime, once my website is up and running — it won’t be perfect of course because I still have to take proper steps in having it look more professional and what not, but for now I just want it up and running with new post/and possibly content and maybe features.. we shall see (one step at a time) and once my podcast is created and running — I will reveal that information as well, along with any other projects I am working on that would be relevant for all of my readers. 

I do want to say THANK YOU, because most of you continue to keep up with my blog post, and comment and still find time to make time for my writings without complaints. I may not be as good as I once was with keeping up with your blogs, but I do appreciate the time you have taken to subscribe to my blog, follow my blog, read and share it. I know being a blogger was not meant to be easy for everyone depending on your goals, and I chose to take the long road with the most reward BUT my blog wouldn’t be as valuable or or hold a purpose without ALL OF YOU BEING APART OF IT 🙂 Thank you for all your continued support. #CHEERS 

Shay-lon

P.S when I compete in my first powerlifting meet, I will also be sharing this with all of you ! 

 

BEGREATGUYS, Inc post #3

Reward your hard work. 

 

BUT 

 

Don’t depend use your reward against you.

 

In a world where sometimes we need a little motivation and a great deal of discipline to accomplish our goals, we have to find the time to reward our hard work. Yes, I said “hard work” because no matter how long it took you to accomplish something — you still have to put in some form of effort to finish it. I once had someone tell me “I walked a mile today, it isn’t much but it felt good” & my reply to this person was, “walking a mile is a lot because you could have stopped half way, but you continued until you finished”. So no matter what you think is a lot or a little, if you finished it — then you achieved something great. 

 

Rewarding yourself doesn’t have to be something ‘out of this world expensive’ unless you want it to be and doesn’t have to be daily, you can make it a monthly thing or a yearly big event, or something small each week. Rewarding your hard work doesn’t have to be done alone either, share your good news with friends and family and allow them to be apart of your big day! How you choose to reward yourself can be a broad range of things: new running shoes, something new for the bike, weekend vacation with the family, spa day, new fitness clothes from your favorite store, new gym bag, upgraded gym equipment for the garage, etc. The reward is for you to choose and something that will make you happy for accomplishing what you accomplished and keep you motivated to continue doing well for yourself. 

 

On the other side of things, rewarding yourself can be a positive thing gone negative if you aren’t cautious of how you reward your results. Some people may find their reward system may diminish their results/prevent them from further progress. These types of rewards are only benefiting you at the time, but in the long run they ruin what you worked hard for and set you back a couple of notches if you aren’t careful. The type of rewards I am speaking on are: eating a cookie for every mile you accomplish in the day, going to Mcdonalds for dinner on the weekends for eating healthier options during the week, buying clothes that are a size or two smaller to work towards, buying a motorized scooter instead of taking your bike to work, etc. These things are all good rewards in the beginning but these same rewards will work against you in the long term if you aren’t careful. 

For example maybe you decide since you are making so much progress, you will start to buy clothes a size or two smaller so that you have something to work towards each week or month, and while this type of motivation & reward doesn’t sound like such a bad idea upfront, in the long term it can turn into a bad decision because you become obsessed with wanting to fit the clothes and when you don’t feel as though you are making fast enough progress or it becomes a game of “I have had these same pair of jeans for 5 years hoping I would be able to fit them again”; it can start to weigh down on you mentally. Same with wanting to reward yourself with food, in the beginning it might sound like a good idea because you have chosen to cut them out of your life otherwise, but in the long term it can turn into a habit that becomes the delay of your progress. I believe if you want to eat something, do it but paying mind to the amount of it and how it may or may not effect your results is important because you don’t want to work hard for something and then end up losing it all due to your reward system because that same reward system is what is keeping you going in the first place — what sense would it be to have made an accomplishment then throw it all away at the same time.

 

Along side a good reward system would be to have a purpose/ A “Why” so that when the reward system fails you, you can use your purpose to keep you going again — a good purpose/good why, is one that drives you, keeps you grounded and doesn’t leave you with doubt. Sometimes our why’s can take the place of our rewards because our why is the reward.

 

Thank you for reading, please take the time to leave comments, likes, share or reblog, and follow. 

 

This post was in honor of my sponsor #BEGREATGUYS 

check us out at https://begreatguys.com/ and find my personal page at https://begreatguys.com/shay-lon-moss

 

Be sure to use my promo code “Shay” for discounted prices on apparel 🙂 

 
 

I passed my exam!

ACSM certified personal trainer!

I wanted to share the good news with everyone, I retook the ACSM personal training exam for the third time and PASSED IT! I am not certified and really excited. I shared the good news on social media if you follow me, but wanted my blog friends to know the good news. For this reason, I have not been on the blog in 5 days, because I was really focused and determined and wanted to spend my days studying (it paid off). The test was hard and very long, but I am so happy it is finished, finally over! no more studying for the exam that cost me my sanity, LOL. 

 

In the meantime, I am focusing on changing my social media platforms to reflect the good news of my certification. I am giving myself 2-4 weeks to have a business plan/ideas written down, because along with working at a gym, I want to build my own personal training business and build a clientale list that hopefully will be both profitable and fun! I have a knack for fitness and wanting to help people feel good about themselves, so that’s my mission. Everything will be in steps and NOT rushed, because I want my business to flourish and be true to self and my values. It’s very important I pay attention to key details and have patience because I know it will take time. 

 

If you are a personal trainer or someone who currently runs your own business within the fitness industry, I would love to hear tips, advice, any type of help that would be in my favor to give me more perspective. I have learned some things from my college days but it has been 2 years since I have graduated and some of the teachings have faded from my mind since then, so I want information and of course want to network with like-minded individuals. 

 

Next stop: working on a business plan. 

 

Thank you to all those who have been more than supportive of me and my dreams, goals and aspirations. I live for this and want to be the best trainer and help I can be within this industry.  

 

I have plans of creating a whole new website (with my own domain) for just personal training – but I will continue to keep this blog and make post and will have links, etc, I just want a more professional looking website for the business aspects and I also am thinking of making a new FB page dedicated to personal training with fun blogs, videos, sign up pages for training, etc, which then in turn will mean a second Instagram profile that is separate from my personal instagram –I would continue to post to the personal one. 

I will continue to train for powerlifting and meets, so that won’t stop but now I have another focus and that is building myself & my brand. 

 

Shay-lon 

Tomorrow’s opportunity

Hello readers, and bloggers; I apologize I haven’t been around for the past 3-4 days. I thought I was feeling better — but come to find out Thursday my body wasn’t having it and I quit my whole workout to go home and rest up .. it was hard, because I was quite frustrated and very pissed off (I wasn’t able to hit my new 1 Rep max squat Thursday) so I didn’t go home on a good note. Since then, my sore throat has gone, but now I have runny nose, nasal congestion, chest congestion, and every so often a cough. I have been spitting up nasty gooey stuff (mucus) — it’s gross looking but it has helped clear my throat & seems to slowly help with my chest congestion by spitting it up often. I have been paying much attention to the color and texture because obviously if it should progress or turn into blood or something; I will then make an appointment to see my medical doctor. For now liquids, rest and taking things slow at the gym. 

 

In other news,  tomorrow is a HUGE day for me because I will be going out of town to train with Matt Wenning (world record holder powerlifter,owns his own gym, has a Masters and bachelors degree, tactical trainer, etc.) and I don’t know what all to expect and especially with this cold I have — but I am excited and scared all at once. I know I will need a good night’s rest, eat something that will help fuel me, stay humble, hopefully soak in everything he shows/teaches me and work hard at whatever he has me doing tomorrow. Outside of those main things, I have no way of preparing for this moment. I plan on keeping all of you abreast on the session — because this is an awesome opportunity I have and I want to take full advantage of it and also, have something to share with all of you from it. 

 

If you aren’t sure who Matt Wenning is, you should find him on #instagram at @realmattwenning and do some google searches as well, you will be impressed. 

 

I have some Monday photos showing of my progress since being sick — gym progress

 

Follow me on social media, leave comments and share. 

 
 

Shay-lon