BeGreatGuys Post #4 — Being Average is Okay

Nowadays, people are striving to be the “best”, the best at sports, work, parenting, school, etc. It seems people steer themselves in the direction of competition in order to come out first, to be granted a reward, to be applauded, and to be remembered as someone with importance. In my opinion, the best thing to do is “be your best self” and that doesn’t mean winning at every sport or getting straight A’s in school; it means living life trying to have a good character, to stand up for what’s right when necessary, following your values/morals that correlate with who you are & choosing to surround yourself with like-minded individuals who don’t want to see you mentally exhausting yourself to be first place ALL THE TIME , but will also be there when you lose. 

 

Being average, doesn’t have to mean being complacent, or going through life with no aspirations — all that average means, is being okay with not being perfect in every aspect of your life and being okay with making mistakes, with losing a game, with getting a C on a test and studying hard next time to strive for that B+ & not weighing yourself down with comparisons to others, and obsessions of winning or being known by many. If all that attended your funeral were your family members and 3 close friends, would you be okay with that? or would you be the one to say, “nobody cares about me, only this many people attended” .. does the number that attends your funeral make a difference in how you feel about yourself? because if you think that having 100 people at your funeral is any better, try having 100 people at your funeral but only 5 of them actually care and have something they can share; memories, pictures, stories, and friendships — all the while the other 95 people attended just because they felt bad and didn’t want to be mean by not attending and didn’t even know who you really were (they liked you because you always won first place) but the second you lose first place, you lose those 95 people who you thought cared. 

 

Yes, strive for success and be great at things, excel in school and work. Compete in sports, be nominated for a prize for your efforts and continue to dream big — but don’t forget that being average doesn’t mean you suck, or that you can’t win, or that you are 2nd place loser. Being average is okay, because being average awards you the same gratification; you made progress, you did better and you might not have won every race or scored more points than your opponent but you tried and trying is way better than wishing you had. Being average doesn’t make you weak, fat or ugly, it means you are perfectly okay with being who you are because you love yourself and don’t need the audience to validate your worth; you don’t need a trophy, a fan club, a billboard in order to know you have a good character, you have flaws but don’t use them to weigh you down and that you put your effort into something you love- win or lose. You don’t need to know you are the best, to feel your best. 

 

I would know what being average is, because I am average and I love it all the same. 

 

“The best part about not winning all the time, is being able to lose and still walk away with a win; you kept the same attitude as you would have winning” -Shay-lon 

 
 
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I passed my exam!

ACSM certified personal trainer!

I wanted to share the good news with everyone, I retook the ACSM personal training exam for the third time and PASSED IT! I am not certified and really excited. I shared the good news on social media if you follow me, but wanted my blog friends to know the good news. For this reason, I have not been on the blog in 5 days, because I was really focused and determined and wanted to spend my days studying (it paid off). The test was hard and very long, but I am so happy it is finished, finally over! no more studying for the exam that cost me my sanity, LOL. 

 

In the meantime, I am focusing on changing my social media platforms to reflect the good news of my certification. I am giving myself 2-4 weeks to have a business plan/ideas written down, because along with working at a gym, I want to build my own personal training business and build a clientale list that hopefully will be both profitable and fun! I have a knack for fitness and wanting to help people feel good about themselves, so that’s my mission. Everything will be in steps and NOT rushed, because I want my business to flourish and be true to self and my values. It’s very important I pay attention to key details and have patience because I know it will take time. 

 

If you are a personal trainer or someone who currently runs your own business within the fitness industry, I would love to hear tips, advice, any type of help that would be in my favor to give me more perspective. I have learned some things from my college days but it has been 2 years since I have graduated and some of the teachings have faded from my mind since then, so I want information and of course want to network with like-minded individuals. 

 

Next stop: working on a business plan. 

 

Thank you to all those who have been more than supportive of me and my dreams, goals and aspirations. I live for this and want to be the best trainer and help I can be within this industry.  

 

I have plans of creating a whole new website (with my own domain) for just personal training – but I will continue to keep this blog and make post and will have links, etc, I just want a more professional looking website for the business aspects and I also am thinking of making a new FB page dedicated to personal training with fun blogs, videos, sign up pages for training, etc, which then in turn will mean a second Instagram profile that is separate from my personal instagram –I would continue to post to the personal one. 

I will continue to train for powerlifting and meets, so that won’t stop but now I have another focus and that is building myself & my brand. 

 

Shay-lon 

26 compared to 25. (Motivation Monday)

It’s probably fair to assume that since turning 26 on Thursday March 22nd, I have looked back on my life & everything that has changed (my goals, my maturity level, my growth, my career goals, my morals, my circle of friends, etc) some of the changes haven’t been big, but gradual over the course of the years and other changes, I made right away because it was “time”; time to develop myself and strive for new goals for myself. Goals that would challenge me and that could be accomplished by the time I reach 27 of next year. 

To begin with, I believe the big change in my life since turning 26 is my maturity level and level of understanding myself, this doesn’t mean that I won’t have fun at 26 or will live life “seriously” every given day; it means I have new priorities and obligations that mean more to me this year to have accomplished than it did the previous years. It means when I tell myself I want to do something — I will do it, because I am getting older and time is of the essence; and it means I am going to focus on my prospering my life a whole lot more. The fun will be there; the living life to the fullest won’t disappear, but the journey will be more focused and more dedicated than before. The “understanding myself” part is the time I have taken to clear my mind of the past mistakes and opening my mind to what it means to be happy within myself, finding ways to conquer my bad days, humbling myself in order to create a better circle of people who surround me, taking time to “treat” myself, putting myself first, getting to know my flaws & learning to better myself in all areas of my life one step at a time. All of these things about understanding who I am, is going to take time & won’t come fast but it shows I have progressed when I can see changes in myself that make me happy. 

 

My career goals, have pretty much stayed the same but with a addition of things that will help fulfill my life & add more fun to my goals — keep me on my feet but not overwhelm me with stress. Of course these goals will also take some learning on my part and some networking and possibly even more sacrifices — in the beginning, I wasn’t prepared for this, but now I feel I am more prepared because I see what I do on a daily basis and realize I have to have balance in my life to achieve my success — I have to work harder with more effort but not work harder and stressed. That’s a huge change I am making for myself, learning to find ways to cope with overwhelming amounts of stress (stress won’t disappear, because I know it happens) but instead of shutting down; I want to work through it and find my “coping ways” so that I can live a more positive lifestyle. My career choices will be stressful in the beginning because it will be a whirlwind of emotions and dedication — but in the end, I want it to be fun and take my breathe away every time.

 

Friendships & family members. I have decided that I won’t chase after people in order to keep them close. I will make better efforts to keep in contact with close friends and mend relationships that might need mending and I will eliminate any negativity that keeps me from thriving. I will be happy for those who succeed in life and hope that when I progress, they will be happy for me. I will stay humbled, no matter how far I come, because I won’t forget where I started and who helped me to get there when I needed the boost of motivation — that’s really important, staying humble. I am going to make new friendships but be picky in choosing my friends, I will not allow family to keep me from being who I want to be in this world because it might not fit their dream. I have decided that if you want to be in my life for the long haul, then I won’t have to ask, because I will know 🙂 My friends and family I love dearly and always will, but with love doesn’t mean I have to stop going for what I want for myself, it means they should be my biggest fans and always support me through and through and if I should fall, they will be the people who I can cry on & the same people who tell me to get back up and keep going. 

 

My physical well-being. I am transforming my body to new heights, I am becoming stronger and more willing to push myself past limits that before I was too scared to try. My physique is showing changes — some I enjoy and some I do not, but with my continued fight to accept myself, I will keep training and continue to make this a trial and error situation until I find the right balance with my body and diet. I will also take more care of my skin, my hair, my outer appearance because I want to feel good and look good. 

 

Mentality — My mental state will need work, because I have anxiety and mild forms of depression at times, but I have come a long way in handling these two things and also, have found new forms of better managing them without having to take medication (I refuse to take medication, never have) so I want to keep my mental state in check and make sure that on my off days, I really take the proper “me” time. I have also decided after talking to a friend to start up writing in a journal (keeping a diary of everything each day); I used to do this but stopped last year during my break up with an ex, but I enjoyed doing it, so want to give it a go again. My body dysphoria (lack of seeing myself the way others view my body) is ongoing battle as well but I am learning to look at myself and not nit pick everything. It won’t go away, but it does have it moments where it isn’t as bad. Thankfully having an encouraging circle helps soften my blows to myself. 

 

Goals — life goals will be ever changing because I have many of them and some that I want to do before 27 and others I want to do before dying. I plan on writing them all down and checking them off. Some of the goals will be with friends and others will be done on my own but either way, I want to stay motivated and having goals will help with that, but I won’t allow myself to become upset if I shouldn’t make them in a deadline because shit happens. 

 

Financially stable. I have reached a point in my life where finances are becoming more and more important; I can’t rely on money falling from the sky, so I have to work to keep myself responsible for my lifestyle choices. While being rich would be nice, I aim to be more comfortable and to live a less lavish lifestyle and more minimal way of spending money. I will spend money on travels, food, shelter and for memories that I can keep, I will buy clothes when necessary and new shoes when needed, and will continue to spend money on loved ones on special occasions.  I won’t allow myself to go broke in order to keep up with the “Jones”, and I won’t allow myself to feel obligated to buy things for a few compliments. Taking care of myself, that will be important, making sure I can pay on credit cards, being sure I can afford groceries and living circumstances, being sure that I can afford having a social life with friends, being sure I can afford my needs — that is important to me. There was a time when affording materialistic things in order to “fit in” mattered to me, but after growing up and realizing most people don’t give a shit and realizing that I have no business trying to impress someone who is superficial in the first place — I am going to spend my money more responsibly so that in the end, I have savings, I have emergency funds and have a better grip on my finances. I began this process by cutting up all my credit cards. 

 

Dating — If I am being honest, I am single and currently not in any rush to jump into a new relationship. I am  over my ex, but not yet ready to share my life with someone because I have things I want to do on my own for the time being BUT I am open to dating and meeting people. I even started talking to someone but was upfront on my intentions. We both agreed if we end up together — awesome but if not, then we are totally okay with having a fantastic friendship — right now I enjoy their company and they enjoy mine, we have some great conversations and share many personal things with one another. I find that this time around, I know what I look for in a potential partner and have also opened my mind to other things about people that I was blinded to in the beginning because of my superficial thoughts. Wherever this road takes me, I don’t know, but for now I am enjoying myself and this is important because I want to be happy alone before adding someone to my life. 


Athlete — being an athlete is my job and hobby, it’s my thrill and stress, my fun and competition. I love it, and my continued goals of competing and influencing others to be their best self in whatever they do is ongoing. I have been sponsored by companies, have been lifting since may 2016 and will be competing in powerlifting and will then broaden my horizon in other fitness industry sports so that I am well rounded and can offer more help when training my clients and growing my business. 

In becoming an athlete and growing my social media platforms, I have found where I need work when it comes to my own lifts and where I want to grow mentally and physically. This is part of who I am and who I choose to be, I don’t need fame to make me relevant within the industry, having made my own path and working towards growing my brand — I hope my athletic ability will motivate others to be reckless, kick ass and smile every chance they get when they want to better themselves in their sports. I want my brand to be about confidence, humbled experiences and thriving from positive people. xo 



Of course there are many other aspects to my life that I feel are important == but to keep this post short and sweet, those aspects I won’t mention at this time. I believe where my life is now, is not where I want it to be next year, I want it to be bigger, better and have more achievements. I know today is Monday, and what better way to spend it than to start this new journey at 26 now. I have a book I want to write, actually two books I want to write, so that will be a whole other addition to my goals that I want to accomplish. 26 never felt so inspiring, but I am thrilled to get this path started! 

 

Thanks for reading, hopefully all of you enjoyed this read. Feel free to leave comments, share and follow my blog. 

 

Shay-lon 

 
 

Good news with a cherry on top

If you are on my Facebook, you probably already know the good news… 

 

But many of you are not, so I have some positive news to share with my fellow readers .. 

 

Today was an overall good day, after my workout this morning, I had to train a client and then I had to work the front counter til 8pm at the gym but many things happened today that made me smile and many things have happened since today, that have enlightened my life since working at the gym and also since meeting new people and making new friendships, so I will share what I shared on FB with all of you. 

 
 
  1. Trained my client this afternoon and just love her as a person, she just has a wonderful heart and does so well 😀
  2. I had someone from the gym tonight bring me tamales, the sweetest and both of her sons are just so awesome.. the one hugged me and I always feel like family to them. I so appreciate it ❤
  3. I might have some new clients to train, possibly a couple… and that’s exciting because they seem eager and I hope if anything, I hope can raise their self esteem and give them something to look forward to when they arrive in the gym regardless if I’m their trainer or not… I always aim to build people up.. because I want people to feel like they belong and feel good about themselves because I know the feeling of low self esteem and wanting to give up and I hope everyone I train and help I make them feel empowered and cared about. I always tell people I believe in them, because if nobody else does, I want them to know I do! 
  4. I’ve made some great friendships and people who have been amazing toward me in and out of the gym, just your hello and a high five puts a smile on my face and I love you guys. I appreciate those who have always encouraged me in my lifting and encouraged me to be my best self, thank you
  5. the awesome instructor and a few ladies invited me out in the next few weeks for my birthday and I just feel like it definitely means something, I appreciate them
  6. I tell ya, this dentist who comes into my gym, he is so funny and just down to earth and humble. His conversations have always been a learning experience and something to look forward to, I love it.
  7. I talk too much and never get out of the gym on time, lol

I also want to thank all of you who take the time to follow, read and share my blog among your peers, whom have taken the time to leave comments and share conversations with me on social media. I have been blogging for a little over 2 years now and it feels like a lifetime because I have met some wonderful and skillful bloggers — people who have transformed since day one of following them and have seen me transform since day one of following me. To watch your growth as writers has been an absolute honor and I look forward to many more years of watching and being apart of your experience. Blogging has become second nature to me, a second full time hobby and job, I take it seriously and share my life (good and bad) with all of you because I want to be real and want to show my own growth, my own stumbles and my own get up moments. As bloggers, it gets easy getting caught up in the stats and wanting to have the most viewers and followers, etc. & that stuff is all fine and dandy, but for me, it means more when I develop relationships/bonds with people who read my content. I have fallen behind on post, have made changes to the blog, and have fallen short on quality of post at times, but it never ceases to amaze me how many of you continue to be there no matter. I appreciate all of you and wish all of you the best with your continued writing and may we continue to build friendships and share laughs with one another for the next many years ahead of us ❤ 

—– Shay- lon 

Fitness/health Tip #3: Quality of life

https://soundcloud.com/shay-lonfitnesswonderwoman-moss-fitness-wonderwoman/fitness-health-advice-3

To have a good “quality of life” is important for good health. We seem to always strive for a nice physique, for wealth and success – which is fine. But some of the more happiest of people, more healthiest of people, & genuine of people tend to have a quality of life that is rather amazing. When I say quality of life, I mean overall, how you choose to live your day-to-day, how you take care of yourself mentally and physically and the attitude you give off to others and the type of people you allow in your circle. All of which add up to your quality of life, and some people find their quality of life changes as they age and become more versed with the world and all it has to offer & become more picky as to how they spend their life. I want to strive to have a good quality of life, to have my priorities in order and be somebody that others can see that in the way I carry myself, my attitude and values. 

 

Have you ever thought about what it means to have a good quality of life? what does it mean to you? 

 

Fitness WonderWoman,

Shay-lon

 
 
 

A New Week, A New Thought

Bloggers,

I decided to add another fun topic to my blog because well, I wanted to and because there are some things I think would be fun to talk about with within this category. This specific category will be called “Thinking Out Loud” & I will post it on Sundays! basically this will integrate my thoughts for the week, current events (preferably around fitness/health), my opinions on certain things in the industry, it might talk on my experiences or tell a story, it might be discussing things outside of the scope of fitness/health, it could be about anything really that doesn’t already fit into my other categories (which I will name at the end of this post) so hopefully all of you will enjoy it greatly because I am looking forward to it myself. 

 

ALSO…For those of you who may not follow my soundcloud account, I have decided that I also want to add another category based off of my podcast & it will be “Tuesday Fitness/health advice & tips” so I will continue my podcast series but will be adding this to the blog as well now because I want everyone to benefit from this 🙂 Which this basically is going to be me giving you advice & tips and also be answering questions that maybe people have asked me or have for me now that could be helpful for others. 

 

ALSO, ALSO… My podcast is supposed to have interviews, current events, Q & A on Saturdays, but I have been slacking and yet to do that, so not only will that continue (as soon as I find ways to get that going) but WHEN and IF I have time, I will be adding guest post to my blog (which is nothing new) but haven’t done it in a  LONG time. Yikes! sorry.  but this will take place on Saturday’s or Sundays possibly – the way I will go about it, is I just have a list of over 100 DIFFERENT TOPICS I want to write about written down and some are meant for guest post and some are meant for me to write about – so basically if I come to you about writing something for me, it is because I feel like you could be a good person to discuss that particular topic BUT this does not mean I don’t allow people to write guest post otherwise, because I have had people come to me about wanting to guest post (which is fine) but I am just really picky because this blog is my baby! lol so don’t take offense if I don’t accept your topic or request to write a post on my blog, because I like to be choosy because I worked my ass off on this blog like everyone else on theirs. 

 

ALSO, ALSO, ALSO.. LOL.. I have been doing Review Wednesday’s on YouTube (so yes, I will be adding them to the blog regularly on Wed whenever I do them) 

 

So with this all being said and laid out, I am hoping going into this new year, my blog will continue to grow, and give everyone something to read about that they are interested in no matter what journey they are on as far as fitness/health goes. 

 

Blog Schedule:

 
  1. Monday: Motivation/Inspiration quotes & my workout for the day
  2. Tuesday: Exercise (how to do/I choose an exercise and discuss it), my workout for the day, YouTube exercise videos, & fitness/health tips & advice
  3. Wednesday: My reviews, injury prevention post & my workout for the day
  4. Thursday: Mental health awareness post & my workout for the day
  5. Friday: No blog post
  6. Saturday: Recipes & my workout for the day, possible guest post
  7. Sunday: “Thinking out loud” Sunday post, possible guest post

Podcast Schedule:

  1. Monday: Motivation/Inspiration
  2. Tuesday: Fitness/health advice & Tips
  3. Wednesday: LGBT+ Topics and discussion
  4. Thursday: Recipes (a lot of times I will share this recipe on Saturday’s blog post for recipes so don’t be shocked if they turn out to be the same thing at times because not everyone follows my blog or podcast.. so I want everyone to hear and see the same things)
  5. Friday: no podcast
  6. Saturday: Interviews, Q & A, current events, misc 
  7. Sunday: no podcast

If anyone has any questions about these two schedules, let me know! As far as YOUTUBE goes, my schedule has not been completely made yet, so when I have that organized, I will be sure to post that schedule as well. 

Keep in mind that I work two jobs and I have studies & with holidays coming up and growing my brand, I will be busy and I might miss days of the week or have to post certain topics on other days because I am hella busy like everyone else in the world, don’t get mad at me, I am only human and I will do my best to continue making fun content that engages all of you! I love all my bloggers and readers and appreciate all of you for being my #1’s 🙂

My Social media (Yes, you can follow me)

YES, I do use them all (some more than others) so feel free to add me! otherwise, everyone have a wonderful Sunday!

 

Fitness WonderWoman,

 

Shay-lon xo

P.S don’t forget my second blog ... https://gaylesbianme.wordpress.com/

Fitness/health Advice Podcast #3

Quality of life

https://soundcloud.com/shay-lonfitnesswonderwoman-moss-fitness-wonderwoman/fitness-health-advice-3