365 Day Self Discovery Challenge — Day Two

Yesterday’s question

This question is from yesterday, and I apologize ahead of time for not posting it yesterday online (I did answer it in my journal yesterday) — time got away from me and didn’t have time to log on and post it on the blog. 

If you could change one thing about yourself, what would it be?

Well for beginners, there is many things I don’t like about myself —- not as a form of self hatred but being observant of the flaws I hold that can and/cannot be changed. For this particular question, I answered it with honesty but in knowing that it is something that can be changed and worked on to better improve myself. Many of you may be able to relate or might have been able to at some point in your life — and hopefully no longer hold this flaw or are in the works of improving it so that it doesn’t hold you hostage. 

  • I would change the fact that I am hot tempered — quick to get enraged or frustrated. I never really accepted this trait previous to this question because I don’t like having to recognize that this could be an issue and one that forbids me of good relationships and lacks maturity. I cannot deny that there have been many times I have been quick to be offended and spoke out & ended up hurting someone’s feelings due to not thinking before I speak & simply speaking with anger rather than with a calm mind. I have been hot tempered all my life, some years have been worse than others, and now it isn’t as much of an issue until it is. I don’t necessarily find myself physically violent towards people, I just have a quick tongue that will do damage because my rage is speaking on my behalf & it has caused friendships to plummet & even my own family has had to endure it — my mom being the #1 person due to her being even more hot tempered than myself and us clashing when we argue. If you haven’t seen a fire show up close, watch us fight with words and venom and it gets heated fairly quickly. 0-100. I am not proud of my past and how I have chosen to handle most situations (although some of them gave me a reason to be angry and I don’t regret sticking up for myself when need be) — we are human, but this doesn’t excuse my behavior when I get worked up, I need to find better coping methods and better forms of handling my anger so I don’t lose out on people that mean to me. Growing up it was normally with my brother having to prove myself with him and feeling as though it never settled at just words, it would eventually lead to physical confrontations because I wasn’t thinking rationally & many times it even ended up being the same way with my mom as well, the fight, it was never worth it when finished, but in the beginning, it was like the adrenaline got the best of me every time. In relationships I have never been physically violent towards the ones I am dating or friends with, but I have yelled and got cocky, snarky, and said very demeaning things in place of it, and i can’t say it ever ended well — not necessarily in break ups but I am sure it left them in fear or feeling overwhelmed with how to handle the situation. Hell, I would always apologize afterwards during the calm down phase after ‘walking away’ or shutting down — and staying silent, that was my way of letting the person know I was finished with the discussion until I was good and ready to speak on it again. It’s not fair and I felt as though I was being abusive with my words towards them, and all they could do was just take it, take it and try to stay strong & maybe put up a argument back but end up giving up because they couldn’t get through to me because I was in the ‘red’ ; the I don’t give a fuck phase. 

I apologize for the pain that I may have caused some to feel due to my anger and lashing out without thinking things through, I have gotten better at holding my tongue and not jumping into each situation with fist pumping — way better but not yet perfect. It will take me time to completely allow myself to surrender those traits but it is something that is very important for me to do. All this being said, I still need enough fight in me for when I need to defend myself or stand up for myself or use my voice when it calls for it, because I don’t want to be weak & growing up when I didn’t stand up for myself — my mom would yell and punish me, she would be disappointed and expect me to handle things the way she had or/ would have. I wasn’t confrontational with people, I never have been, I don’t like it/ it makes me feel uncomfortable & I think many times this is why I lash out the way I do because it was instilled in me to have a backbone & that the walking away and allowing stuff to happen was the weak way of handling things. I never found the healthy balance, it was either being walked on or walking on others right back — and I acknowledge there is much better process than either one of these, sometimes a still tongue goes further than a talking mouth. Truth be told, my anger isn’t bad, my choice to allow it to control my emotions when I am feeling overwhelmed and scared of the confrontation is bad. It’s used as my armor & to prevent me from being vulnerable and walked on, but in the end it also causes me deep regret later on. Learning this, I am happy I can admit this flaw & make it a goal to improve, I am happy with how far I’ve come now with it, but I want to make it a conscious effort each time a situation arises. These days, my first line of defense is to seek out answers with a calm level headed mind & to step away when things don’t pan out the way I had planned so that I can avoid blowing up. I hope many of you with this same trait has found a way to postpone it so that you can think things through beforehand — it is worth it. 

I thank all of you for reading and choosing to be apart of my self discovery challenge. Please take the time to answer this question for yourself; either in a post or privately and come up with a solution — think about how this particular trait or attribute hinders you or how it makes other people feel. It’s never easy to speak on our flaws because people assume we are dangerous or damaged or no good, but that’s not it, people can change if they choose to and want to, they have to be willing to find a better path, to search for answers for their pain and use it to improve themselves and grow. Now all of our flaws will be able to change, but the ones that we can, that hold negativity, should be something we work towards bettering. 

Shay-lon

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Been Gone for awhile

If any of you follow me on social media, you are probably aware that I had a really downward spire rough week & avoided contact with social media, friends, family, etc. I won’t get into specifics, but I have been gone for quite a while (due to circumstances) happening in my life that came unplanned and unwanted — Today is my first day back on the blog & social media in “full swing” again. The past week or so hasn’t been easy and honestly, it is only because of prayer and having the courage to get back up again when I felt dark that I am even able to write about it. Naturally, sometimes circumstances give you a chance to look at yourself with more clarity and find ways to focus on self healing, self discovery and possibly rely on some form of spiritual sense. Well as cliche as it might sound, that’s exactly what this situation left me to do besides laying in bed all day with no motivation and no drive to talk or be apart of life’s endeavors — I have decided to take on some books that hopefully will be a positive force within my life and future & I have started meditation once more, hopefully sticking with it this time, I am going to take some steps to help myself journal my self discovery and really dive into myself & try to make myself happy with what I plan on doing. It will be some steps and quite the voyage, but I feel it will be worth it. 

I pretty much will be going back to my normal routine but with some added bonuses to my daily lifestyle & my main focus will be building myself emotionally, physically, spiritually and mentally while building my career as a Personal Trainer. I know I have been back and forth with a schedule that works for my readers so that I stay more consistent with blogging & I plan on doing that as well (coming up with a schedule) and now that my mind is less overwhelmed, I will surely do this and let people know what will be happening with the blog(s). I have many topics but I have been working on a personal website for my business, and I plan on blogging there as well, so I want to leave many topics for that particular website when it gets finished up (& yes some topics will be from this blog as well/perhaps with a new frame of mind) I need to find a way to keep myself accountable with the self discovery and meditation — so I may decide to take part in a challenge for a year or use the blog to keep me on the right path (we shall see). I will be using a journal to document my daily thoughts, emotions, the agenda and events — good and bad to keep me aware of myself. Hopefully in the end, this is something that will help to heal and build me with a new form of appreciation for myself. 

I currently downloaded a meditation app that I have been doing for the past 4 days & it has been wonderful; if anyone wants information on it, feel free to ask, maybe we can connect. Outside of that, I will be back on social media tomorrow to reply and show support — I appreciate all of you whom have been nothing but a great positive force within my blog career and life. Much appreciated and looking forward to speaking soon!

P.S I don’t have a consistent plan/routine yet for my self healing or self discovery yet, so if you have nay books, any journals or articles (whatever resource) that you would recommend, feel free to leave it in the comments, as it would bring me great joy to further my research and find a way that works best for me through your help.

Shay-lon 

Fucked Around With Deadlifts & Got hurt

So I have three videos to show everyone & will drop the links below. One will be my 300 lb deadlift fail, another will be my 295 complete and the final one will be my 245 lb for 3 reps —

Today I was aiming to hit 300 lb and well, I tried it over 20 times over (without adequate resting between sets and aggressively toward the end) to the point where I ended up hurting one side of my lower back/upper hip. Normally I am really good about NOT injuring myself, but today neglected to pay attention to my body and it happened. I could not continue on with the rest of my workout today due to the pain, so hopefully it is only a pulled muscle, a lesson learnt and i’ll be back to lifting normally between tomorrow and Thursday! otherwise, I am doing well for the most part. 

 
 
  • Conventional deadlift: 3 x 5, 3, 1
  1. 75% of 90% of 1-RM: 195 lb, 3 x 5
  2. 85% of 90% of 1-RM: 220 lb, 3 x 3
  3. 95% of 90% of 1-RM: 245 lb, 3 x 1+, 3 max reps
  4. 1 x 1, 295 lb (completed)
  5. 1 x 1, 300 lb (failed attempt)

300 lb deadlift fail video —- > Failed attempt

295 lb one rep completed lifted ——> 295 lb lift

245 lb for 3 reps —- > 245 lb lifting

Groin Pull/Groin Strain (Injury/injury prevention)

This post is not meant to be inappropriate, because groin injuries have happened to some people and are common with most contact sports. 

 

Groin pull? 

Also known as ‘groin strain” , is a tear/rupture to the to any of the adductor muscles resulting pain in the inner thigh. Range from mild to very severe. 

 

Causes: 

 
  • Known to occur when sprinting or changing direction quickly
  • during rapid movements of the leg against resistance 
  • over stretching the muscle
  • having weak adductor muscles
  • not warming up properly
  • tight adductor muscles
  • previous injury to that particular area
  • sometimes lower back injuries can contribute to this injury as well

Symptoms:

  • Sharp pain in the groin area
  • swelling
  • discomfort
  • bruising 

symptoms depend on the severity of the injury.

 

Treatment:

  • Protect the area, ice it, rest it, compress it, and elevate it if possible
  • wearing a groin support can be helpful 
  • sports massage could be useful after 72 hours
  • electrotherapy by medical doctors is said to help the healing process

Every case is on an individualized basis, so make sure to contact your medical professional for further information/help

 

Have you experienced a groin pull, how long did it take to heal? what procedure did you use to help the healing process – leave answers in the comment section. 

If you enjoyed the post, like, comment, share and follow!

 

Fitness WonderWoman,

Shay-lon xo

Wrist Sprain (Injury)

Today is Wednesday .. and for any of you who have been keeping up with my schedule, today’s topic is of an injury. This particular injury may not be the most “popular” one but it is an injury nonetheless and so we shall talk about it. First question: has anyone reading this post ever sprained or dislocated their wrist? Let me know in the comment section your experience. 

 

What does it mean to sprain your wrist:

  • usually involves the wrist being bent forward or back
  • Not commonly known to occur as an “overuse” injury
  • Can vary from mild to a more severe sprain of the wrist (Grade 1, Grade 2 or Grade 3)

Symptoms:

  • Sudden pain in the wrist
  • if more severe you will feel a tearing or popping
  • Tender spot where the ligament was damaged
  • mild swelling
  • and bruising in more severe cases

This all depends on the location and the extent of the injury

Treatment:

  • More mild wrist sprains can be treated at home using the R.I.C.E method
  • Compression bandage can help reduce swelling (not for more than 10 minutes at a time)
  • More severe cases will most likely require immobilization in a split for some weeks
  • Surgery could be required for full ruptures
  • Rehab after surgery is useful.

With this all being said, seek medical care if something should happen like this to play it safe. 

 

Fitness WonderWoman,

Shay-lon xo

 

The R.I.C.E Method

Hello Bloggers,

Today’s blog post will be super short because I am having to work today and got to put a rush order on things. Nonetheless, I decided to vaguely speak on the above method called the “R.I.C.E Method” – which  is: rest, ice, compression and elevation. Now some of you are well aware of this method, which is splendid and others of you probably have never heard of it – either way it is something to remember when an accident happens. 

 

I should mention that each year sometimes methods change, and so if your company, organization, schooling , etc says this is not the method to use any longer, than feel free to ignore it and use whatever one works best for you, but because I was told to follow this method not too long ago by a professional, I choose to continue to use it for the time being. 

 

When to use this method?

 
  • A.S.A.P after an injury; such as a sprain.

The Reason people use this method? 

  • To relieve pain, swelling and promote healing along with flexibility. 

Thanks for reading, be sure to like, comment, share and follow!

 

Fitness WonderWoman,

Shay-lon xo

Taking Risk|Three Channels of Risk

Risk = Opportunity, but not all Opportunities are good.

In a vlog video today I talked about taking risk and my take on risk and how they can be effective and provide opportunities but at the same time can be what kills us (physically or mentally).  My video was aimed for fitness/health people but this blog will speak to the general population and the same rules will apply but maybe different circumstances. Pay close attention for my post for it may be somewhat beneficial for some of you. 

 

I believe that risk comes in three channels, these channels are: death, depleting of oneself and prosperity/growth. From these channels, you are obviously aware that the last one would be the goal or the most beneficial for us and this is very true. I will break down the differences and discuss each one briefly but somewhat like I did in my video, i will then leave you in thought. 

 

The first channel: Death. 

 
  • This particular channel means literally dying or mentally decaying yourself to the point of exhaustion. 
  • An example of death: eating disorders, addictions, suicide, depression.. and the list continues. 
  • Most of us know someone or perhaps ourselves can relate to this channel of risk. 
  • This particular channel of risk is dangerous, and normally the ultimate downfall unless we seek help in time. 

The second channel: Depleting self.

  • This channel poses a threat because it can lead us to the channel of death if we are not careful.
  • An example of depleting self: Trying to be something or someone we are not in order to fit in, allowing others to take advantage of us, having been bullied, traumatic experiences, among many other things
  • Again we have either dealt with this channel ourselves or know someone who is/has. 
  • This particular channel is giving us a choice in how we respond to this particular risk- in most cases people go into death , but others will grow and learn from it. 

The third channel: prosperity and growth.

  • This channel is about taking a risk that has made you successful, motivational, inspiring, and possibly wealthy in many more ways than just money. 
  • This channel takes sacrifices , but they are sacrifices you can handle and or deal with and not regret it down the line if you made the right choice. 
  • This channel only turns into a bad risk if you choose to react to it in a greedy nature or make yourself seem more inferior to others. 

Now that I have covered these three channels of risk, you are probably asking yourself, why would one want to choose death and/or depleting self.. how does one not know that is a bad risk? Well, it isn’t necessarily that one is choosing to be depressed or choosing to be bullied, risk create opportunities and not all opportunities are good ones, so when one chooses to risk losing weight by choosing to eat less and less.. they aren’t necessarily wanting to die they want the opportunity that comes from it – which is being skinny. Now this is may be all very confusing and you can choose to make sense of it however you want, no right or wrong way. I just found myself rambling and decided to share some insight with you. The bottom line is every risk we take effects us either negatively or in a positive manner, we don’t always know until we have taken the risk. Just think about what risk you are willing to take but don’t stop taking them in order to avoid opportunities. 

 

If you are someone who wants to better understand my thoughts, please feel free to watch my YouTube video from today speaking on risk and hopefully it makes some sense. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2fZPKcM7iw4. Thanks for reading, feel free to leave comments, share and or like. 

Your Fitness Blogger,

Shay-lon xxoo