World Mental Health Day

Mental Health Awareness!

Spread knowledge, understanding, love and patience.

https://soundcloud.com/shay-lonfitnesswonderwoman-moss-fitness-wonderwoman/fitness-health-advice-10-world

With today being “World Mental health day” , I wanted to make a post and podcast about mental health. Every Thursday I dedicate my blog to mental health awareness because I believe it is so important to make these disorders known so that they become less of an omen and more of a way to enlighten, teach and hopefully make it so people understand the different mental health conditions – in hopes that we will find more ways to help these individuals and also to help ourselves from being ignorant of the matter. Mental health has been in this world for a long time, there once was time when it was looked down upon and people were sent to places that weren’t so great and were treated very poorly. Being in 2017, it has definitely gotten better but we aren’t perfect, many illnesses are still frowned upon and haven’t been thoroughly researched enough to understand them fully. While I believe we have gotten to a place where people know more than they did, I still believe it is important we continue to educate ourselves and spread awareness. I, being one who suffers from social anxiety and have had my issues with mild depression and nervous breakdowns, it isn’t always easy to talk to people about it, and sometimes it is difficult to share our stories or experiences with others because there is always that fear of judgement or fear that we will be the outcast because of it. Many people who suffer from mental health disorders live normal lives, and work with you and play with you and probably smile in your face at the grocery store but it doesn’t mean they don’t have an inner demon or that they aren’t wearing a mask to get through their day. It is not easy to spot mental health disorders in others and I don’t expect anyone to be professionals at it unless it is their job BUT my goal and hope for all of you is that if someone who know is suffering and trust you with this information, that you can be their light at the end of the tunnel or their ear when they need to talk or their friend when they feel alone— it won’t be easy, God knows, and it probably won’t seem like you are doing anything special for them but from my experience, sometimes knowing that you aren’t a burden to someone because of your illness can make it a little easier. 

 

We all have our own lives to live & our own issues to deal with — I’m not asking people to go out of their way to listen to everyone’s story and play superhero, I just ask that we keep open minded & try to have patience and give what little time we have in our day to a loved one or friend who may need someone to see them for who they are when they aren’t having to disguise themselves in front of the world – because many times if they allow you to see them “raw” as such, it is their way of opening up and hopefully you feel honored knowing this because many hide it and disguise it for a long time & either end up taking their own lives or abuse drugs/alcohol or end up in worse case scenarios. With this being said, I appreciate all of my readers for being supportive of me having to open up to all of you on my blog about myself  and my world and i have had the pleasure of reading and talking to individuals who shared some deeper thoughts/dealt with deeper issues – which in turn helped me to gain understanding and insight into their world. I want all of you to know, I don’t mind being an ear or a friend or being a inspiration to get through the day/ you can count on me to listen and while I might never have the right answers, I will do my best to be there. I love you and I hope everyone has a wonderful Tuesday. 

 

Fitness WonderWoman,

 

Shay-lon xo

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I have Social Anxiety (Mental Health Awareness)

I will be first in line to admit that I have social anxiety (I believe I have mentioned this many times before) and while many people are in shock when I tell them this, because I come off outgoing and very talkative – this doesn’t mean anything, just means I mask it fairly well – not to mention, if you don’t understand social anxiety and what it means, you might not know what to look for when I am put in situations where I react. Now with this being said, this post will be both informative and yet, I will speak from my own experience as well, so hopefully you enjoy stories and perspective. I will start with the basics, what does it mean to have “social anxiety”?

 

Social anxiety is fear of social situations that involve interaction with other people BUT,  it stems from having a fear or anxiety of being negatively judged or evaluated by other people. —- I have dealt with this fear ALL MY LIFE and it sucks because I wanted to be more like the ones who “don’t care what others think” but even when I try, I know deep down I still care (even when I play if off like I don’t) now with this being said, yes, there have been times where I literally do not give a shit about what others think of me, or how they perceive me, and that usually is when I am at the gym or grocery store because I just feel like I have built confidence in those scenarios/environments. Although if you put me inside a new gym or a grocery store in a different town or area, my social anxiety will kick in because it is a new surrounding with new faces and I don’t know how to handle it.. so I just freak out in my mind. For some people they avoid situations like so, but I have learned to force myself to step outside my comfort level and make myself intentionally uncomfortable in order to fight my anxiety. 

 

Now let’s discuss some of the symptoms & I’ll share which ones i have, if any:

 
  • Rapid heart beat- this is another one I experience
  • blushing or sweating- sweating is one for me
  • feeling of mind going blank – I have this one
  • makes little to no eye contact 
  • speaks with overly soft voice
  • self conscious in front of others, feeling of embarrassed or awkward – This one I have
  • Being very afraid that other people will judge them – this one I have
  • Stay away from places where there are other people

Now, as you can see, I have quite a few signs/symptoms and some people have more or less, and not every situation do all these sign/symptoms display themselves. I personally know another sign/symptom that people I have dated have noticed and even people I have talked to, I tend to ramble when I speak in a conversation with someone, especially if I am interested in someone, or if I don’t know how to end a conversation, or if my nerves are all over the place. I know my ex used to mention that I ramble a lot on and off the phone and she would make jokes about it and I knew that sometimes it was awkward but since that relationship, I have been trying to get better at catching myself ramble and doing it less often. I guess for me, it is really tough to not ramble, because it is my way of comforting my anxiety or “hiding” it, but when people notice and make light of it, it makes me feel a little discouraged at times or feel insecure or puts me in an awkward position where I don’t know what to do or how to handle it – and that just means I went from social anxiety to now I am upset with myself and feeling really embarrassed by my actions. None of my friends or family have ever made comments on my rambling and that might be because I don’t ramble with them .. it’s weird, but also I am comfortable with them. I never notice other’s with social anxiety, it goes over my head if someone does and they are talking to me, because I am so focused on my own response and reactions & trying to come off less awkward that if anything I just assume you are shy and nothing more. 

 

Another thing I have noticed is, depending on the person and type of compliment they give me, I tend to get weird and say quick thank yous without even looking in your direction or I am pleasant and want to connect with you and my thank you comes off more friendly. I handle compliments better coming from females vs males as well. For some reason, I have yet to ever be awkward with a female who compliments me, but when it comes to males, it happens often unless I am comfortable with the male figure. Growing up, it wasn’t always like this but as I got older, it started to make sense as to why (& we won’t get into that at this point) but regardless I love compliments but handle them differently depending the nature of them, the sex and how comfortable I am with that person. I have known both, people who are flattered by compliments and others who get really tense and don’t like them.   

 

Causes:

There is NO one cause of it, but many factors that can lead to one possibly having social anxiety – but doesn’t mean you are guaranteed to get it just because you happen to have these issues but the chances could be greater. 

My mom has social anxiety and her’s is worse than mine, I would say, but she reacts to it differently than I do, on the other hand both of my younger siblings don’t seem to have it from the outside looking in, but I am not a professional so I wouldn’t actually know if they did unless they told me – so families can carry this trait. 

Misreading people’s behaviors toward you can be another cause of social anxiety- and I think I am decent at reading people, but I do tend to over analyze at times.

Underdeveloped social skills – this is a possible cause for myself. Growing up, I had friends but I was always the awkward duck, I didn’t know how to properly interact with others and not feel like an outcast and I think because I lacked some self confidence at times, I was always doing weird shit or saying weird random shit that in my mind was my way of trying to fit in but in reality was probably causing people to think I was weird or pushing people away. I developed a more comical personality in order to handle social situations and instead would always be the class clown and make people laugh and that is how I combated my own issues. 

 

As far as treatment goes, I never saw a professional for it, never had therapy or medication for it, and I refuse to go that far for myself because I think I have more of a handle on it now than I did in the past and I don’t feel like mine is very severe compared to other cases. I have learned to mask some of it, in order to push through and I have learned that if I force myself to confront my anxiety by stepping outside my comfort zone, it helps to build my confidence and encourages me to find ways to manage it better. For example, last year and previous years, I would go to Columbus here in Ohio for a weekend and stay in a hotel by myself and explore the city – downtown area, just walk and explore the stores, bars, etc all alone and  by doing that, I met people, I learned to find my own way and to handle situations that would make me uncomfortable and I loved doing that. This year, I went to a bar in my town alone, and the first time it went well, but the second time it went horribly and so I haven’t done it since then but I might consider doing it again at a different point in my life. My new goals to battle my social anxiety is to attend a movie alone and to eat at a restaurant alone because I am so used to doing them both with friends or family, so I want to step outside my comfort zone and do them by myself – also, I would like to attend a concert by myself and would love to drive out of town by myself again and explore another area .. so those are all goals to help me. 

 

I would love to hear from all of you with social anxiety, speak on what helps you, or try one of these ways of coping and let me know if it worked. If you enjoyed this post, like, comment, share and follow! 

 

Fitness WonderWoman,

Shay-lon xo

 
 

Paranoid Schizophrenia (Mental Health Post)

Mental health is just as important as physical health, if not more important. 

 

Hello bloggers, as scheduled today would be mental health awareness by discussing a mental health condition. I chose this particular one because I don’t know anyone who has been diagnosed with it close to me and I didn’t know very much about it to be able to discuss so I had fun being able to research it and gain some understanding. I did happen to know some basics but enough to be able to write about it, so I post some links for this one to sites I used briefly or that I sited so that you can also read up on it, if it something of interest to you. 

 

What is Paranoid Schizophrenia?

 
  • When your mind doesn’t agree with reality – this is the way I understand it and the easiest way of explaining it so others can understand & the same way this site put it.
  • A lifelong illness
  • Affects how you think and behave

Symptoms:

  • Auditory disturbances
  • unexplained anger
  • emotional disconnectedness
  • sever anxiety and agitation
  • argumentive behavior
  • sometimes violent tendencies
  • Delusions of grandeur
  • frequent suicidal thoughts and behavior

Now there are other symptoms that people with schizophrenia may have that are not listed, so make sure to do your research and get a full understanding because each person handles this differently. 

 

Risk Factors:

Most studies say there is no ONE cause of this illness BUT there are some risk factors that can higher your chances: 

  1. Family history of psychotic disorders
  2. exposure to a viral infection in the womb
  3. fetal malnutrition
  4. stress in early childhood
  5. sexual or physical abuse
  6. older parental age
  7. Use of psychoactive drugs during adolescence 

Treatment:

  • THERE IS NO CURE AT THIS TIME FOR THIS ILLNESS!!!!
  • medications
  • psychotherapy
  • hospitalization
  • ECT (Electroconvulsive therapy)
  • training for social skills and development

Now with this being said, these are methods but they depend on the situation and circumstance, not everyone will agree to take medications or undergo therapies and that is their choice. I know many of them take more than one kind of medication and sometimes more than 2 or 3 depending on their situation and symptoms and the severity. The fact there is no cure for it is disheartening because this is something someone will have to deal with for the rest of their lives & I don’t think it would be easy or easy to explain to others who don’t have it and this is why I do these post so that hopefully it sheds light and brings awareness to the issue at hand. I personally have always believed that mental illness goes unnoticed because people don’t understand and believe them to be omens or ignore them in order to pretend it doesn’t exist (ignorance).  I like to think we are growing and learning and accepting people who may be different than ourselves BUT at the same time there are still people who look down on those with any type of mental illness. I believe in order to help people with their illnesses we have to be open minded and forgiving because it is not always that individuals fault that they have it. So with that being said..

 
  1. Do you know anyone who has this illness? or do yourself have it?
  2. Did you know a lot about this illness or was this something new?
  3. will you share this post to bring awareness to mental health 

Links I used for this post: 

 

Thank you for reading!

 

Fitness Wonderwoman, 

Shay-lon xo

The “Female Triad” – Have you heard of it?

Female athletes beware… 

 

It is possible you have experienced this as a female athlete or maybe your child is experiencing this OR it could be that you know someone who is experiencing this. Most females have experienced this depending on the sports they played and how serious they took their athletics – many coaches and parents might not see anything wrong with it because it comes with being an athlete having the mindset of being the best, but what happens when being the best is causing health issues and making it harder on you in the long term and short term. 

 

What is the female Triad?

 
  • A syndrome in which eating disorders, amenorrhoea, and decreased bone mineral density are present. Primarily caused by an energy deficiency. 

Now you would assume, how is this considered normal? well it isn’t. Sadly, many people don’t stop to question these things until it is too late or don’t see the signs right away because they don’t pay close enough attention, or possibly because their teenager is avoiding the topic and allowing the guardian to believe all is well when it is NOT. As athletes, you know we have to make sacrifices and some can be harmful and some can be good, but we make these sacrifices because we want to be the best at whatever we do and we don’t want to make the coach or our teammates upset – we have this mindset of win, win, win and any loss is a bad loss. This was my same mindset as well, any loss was a loss I was mad about and the tantrums I would throw and the cussing and the anger and the blaming the players and the constant striving for perfection is all that mattered to me growing up playing sports. It can be tough being an athlete. 

 

We all have our downfalls but this is serious and I want to bring it to your attention in case any of you might be going through it now or know someone who is, so that maybe you can identify it and be more aware and helpful.. if anything, I hope this post teaches you something new.

 

Who is effected?

  • Typically anyone can be effected, but it primarily effects female athletes who participate in sports that emphasize leanness, such as:gymnastics, ballet, diving, figure skating, aerobics, running. Some other classes that include males experiencing this might be: wrestling, rowing, and martial arts. 

Symptoms:

  1. weight loss
  2. absent or irregular periods
  3. fatigue
  4. stress fractures
  5. binge eating 
  6. restrictive dieting
  7. induced vomiting
  8. excessive exercise

Prevention practices:

  1. AVOID emphasis on achieving unrealistically low body weight
  2. avoid out of competition weigh ins
  3. athletes, coaches and parents need to be aware of any warning signs 
  4. rules encouraging excessive weight loss should be discouraged and eliminated. 

Treatment:

  1. The athlete will deny, but medical help is mandatory because it can become serious and eventually cause long term issues if not death.
  2. they should have proper support from coaches, family, friends, teammates
  3. speak with a nutritionist
  4. many times treatment requires some kind of intervention from different specialist and family, friends, etc

Now with this being said, nothing will change if we don’t become the change. We might not be able to save every athlete or change every coach or parent’s mind but we can be aware with both eyes open and speak on this topic when necessary to avoid it happening to yourself, your child or a friend possibly. I am HUGE on body positiveness and preventing females from going down some of the paths I went down knowingly and unknowingly and hopefully helping those who may have questions or concerns dealing with this topic or any of this nature. I am not a medical doctor but I can offer an ear, advice, tips, conversation, etc that might be helpful to an individual. I don’t want men thinking this can’t happen to them, because I know both sexes deal with issues but this specific issue is more prone to female athletes. All I ask is that all of you share this and talk about it with friends and family and social media, make it an issue so that others make it their problem to change how we coach, change our rules that govern these ways of thinking and to hopefully make some type of difference. 

 

Thank you for reading, please feel free to contact me personally, to leave comments, share experiences, follow my blog and social media, and to reblog if you wish as well. 

 

Fitness WonderWoman,

Shay-lon xo

I Am Only Human

Bound By Flaws.

For a first time in a long time.. 

 

It had occur to me that people see me as this “super human” amazing women who lifts heavy and walks with confidence and seemingly has her life together & everything she does just seems to be #goals (my blog, my workout, my future career, my online presence, physique, etc) & this scares me a little bit, actually a lot of bit. I mean granted I am thankful that I have inspired people, built relationships and rapport with people who now trust me enough to come to me with questions about fitness/health, have had a blog that went from 0 to hero in matter of months and that I tend to make people smile with my random comedic personality BUT what scares me is that people seem to think because of all this I did do, that they think they can’t do it. Like it took some magical pixie dust and oops the store ran out of it, so looks like no one else is capable of doing AMAZING things with their own life. 

 

I hate to give it to you like this.. BUT.. I am only human. That’s right, I came out the vagina the same way you did and I ended up on planet earth just like you. my baby self didn’t have a 6 pack and big arms, I surely wasn’t tying blogs at the age of 2 and I couldn’t have been that famous because I am still broke & I am willing to bet .. no one really even knows me besides family and friends and the people who know of me online. I could lie and say I am a HUGE deal but lets get real, I am not. Do I want to be? YES! because I have a lot to offer in my field and I know I am capable of GREAT things! I believe this. I know how hard I have to work in order to keep my physique in top notch if I want the “deals” and exposure, I know what it takes to keep my blog running smoothly so that all of you keep coming back to pester me about how much you love my stuff (lol)  & I know how much constant research, learning and events it will take for me to build more knowledge so I know what I am talking about and can teach others and spread my knowledge to others who listen to me. My life is not all daisies and wildflowers with tons of sunshine – I have cloudy days. I have periods and bloating that makes me look “gross” , I have struggled with body shaming, I have had the ups and downs of having a nice physique, I have failed in sporting events, I have struggled with my own self confidence and who I am, I have struggled financially, I have lost out on many opportunities (not being good enough), I have days where my abs are no longer there and my arms look like twigs and I am crying trying to pick myself back up. I have had many days where my post suck and I felt like walking away, and for goodness sake .. I know what it is like to have flaws. 

 

The problem is, maybe not all my flaws are seen with the human eye, maybe some of them are seen and you can pinpoint them in less than 5 seconds, but it doesn’t matter because I am no better than anyone else. Being in the fitness field can put a lot of pressure on you to be something like someone else in order to gain a huge following, more “friends”, more money and more fame. I don’t mind the pressure much anymore because I had to stop trying to be like her or him and had to try better at doing what I do best: being me, with flaws and all. I can’t always show my flaws because, hey it is a business, and I have to put on a good face and a good show if I want to keep everyone else around me happy, but when I do, it hits hard — because that is the one time I can let go and just allow myself to cry or get angry. Becoming a trainer isn’t easy either, hell .. you are responsible for someone outside of yourself and being an athlete, well hell you are responsible with being “good” and if not good, then you better be able to handle the harsh criticisms because the world is ready to chew you whole and spit you out. Truth is, during this whole time of learning about myself and wanting to go the distance in everything I do, I have learned I am as strong as I allow but I can’t handle every hurdle and I can’t handle every ball thrown at me.. because like everyone else, I am human and I am going to have days where I fall and getting back up will seem impossible. 

 

Hopefully this post gave people some perspective and understanding. Feel free to leave comments, likes, share it on social media or follow me 🙂 Thank you.

 

Your Fitness Blogger,

 

Shay-lon xxooo

 
 
 
 
 
 
 

Being a Champion is what happens when the world isn’t looking

champions

Maybe we don’t own trophies to prove it, but we all are champions. Many of you probably think I am crazy for saying so, because what is a champion, if they haven’t won anything, right? This is true,  I mean normally a champion wins something, but when I talk about the word champion, I don’t mean winning a Gold medal or first place trophy, I mean we all do something that makes us a champion. Some of us may not always be champions, sure we make mistakes, we fuck up, we land flat on our faces sometimes and complain about it. It isn’t the fuck up that we should be judged for, it’s what we do after the fuck up that makes most of us champions, it is what we do when doors are closed and no one is watching, it is the smile you put on someone’s face without trying, it is the dollar you gave without asking them why, it is the drive you make in order to see a loved one, it is the gift you bought while you were struggling, it is the courage you had when the world was against you, it is the change you made to save your marriage, it’s the story you told to spread awareness, it is the life you saved without mentioning, it is the fight you gave during your battle of cancer, it is the tears you cried watching a loved one die, it is the promise you kept when everything fell apart, is the friendship you gave someone, the last dollar in your pocket you spent on someone else, the last goodbye, etc. 

 

See, athletes are used to being champions in front of a large crowd,  I would know, I was an athlete all my life, we are used to being applauded for our wins, our triumphs, our records, our pristine smile in front of cameras. The world calls you a good person, the world thinks of you being a good role model, being a good child, a good sibling, a good parent all BECAUSE you do a good job at your event or sport. God forbid you are a horrible at your event and/or sport, now the world will think of you as a loser, you suck, we don’t care about you, now your smile is meaningless, your parenting skills go unseen and you no longer have their attention. The sad fact is we all want to be validated for something good we have done, we look for someone to tell us “good job”, “you are awesome”, “that was amazing”, “I want to be just like you when I grow up”, etc. because we put on this face in front of people and make people believe that what we do in the light is what we do in the dark.  O.J Simpson is a good example of this, he was an amazing athlete during his time and people loved and adored him, all of a sudden his wife is murdered and he faces trial and no one wants to believe he killed her because he was a “good” person on camera, during games, at practice, at the park with his son, so how could he kill his wife? He was made out to be this teddy bear and lovable person, but what he did behind closed doors, the camera couldn’t see.  He knew what he did behind closed doors and he knew what the public seen of him, he chose to make bad decisions (in my opinion) behind closed doors, therefore he is a fraud; he only made good decisions when he got something out of it. This is no different than talking badly about a friend of yours then going to hang out with this same person after talking bad about him/her; you’re fraud because your actions done in the light don’t match what is done in the dark. 

 

I am not saying we don’t make mistakes, because we do and we all have a past. The difference is some people change in order to do better, and some people stay complacent. The world only sees what we show, what we don’t show is what makes someone a champion if it is the right thing to do. You don’t need lights, camera, action to be a champion, you don’t need a trophy, a medal, a certificate, or tons of friends, all you need is a good heart and good intentions. “What you do in the dark will come to light when you least expect it” -Shay-lon Moss