Narcissism (Mental Health Post)

Mental Health is just as important as physical health. 

 

It has been awhile since I was able to hit on more mental health topics, considering, I find that many people have mental health conditions that go undiscovered. I have mentioned in prior mental health post that is very important to take care of your mind just as much as it is to take care of your body and for some people it is considered more important but that is neither here or there. My point is in order to take care of yourself, you have to have some kind of balance in your life, one that is destructive toward you or others. 

 

This particular mental health condition is normally a word used closely to the word “selfish”. I am not sure how many people are aware of the mental condition narcissism or even understand it, but in this post, I am going to share some good information to take with you after reading this. I would highly recommend that many of you do your own research afterwards to gain a better understanding of it because I think the more aware we are about something, the less we turn a blind eye to it. Now without offending anyone with this health condition, this is not a post to slam you or make you feel like a piece of shit about who you are or what you do to others, but hopefully will be a wake up call and give you a reason to want to change for the better if possible – like any condition, I don’t expect things to happen overnight. For those of you who might know someone who is narcissistic, then hopefully you will be able to share your thoughts & experiences in the comment section – don’t be afraid to add your own two cents to this post, the more information , the better! 

For beginners what is a narcissist? 

  • A person who has an excessive interest in or admiration for themselves. 
  • It is a “personality disorder”

Based on (DSM)-5 The Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders: These are things that would possibly classify one as narcissistic: (this was published in 2013)

  • exaggerated sense of self-importance
  • expectations of being recognized as superior being (without achievements that warrant it)
  • exaggerating achievements & talents
  • mind is preoccupied with fantasies such as success, power, brilliance, beauty or having the perfect spouse/partner
  • the belief that you are superior and can only be understood by those who are equally special
  • require constant admiration
  • sense of entitlement
  • expectations of having special favors done for them and unquestioned compliance with one’s expectations
  • Taking advantage of others in order to get what they want
  • Inability or unwillingness to recognize the needs and feelings of others
  • being envious of others and belief that others are envious of you
  • behaving in an arrogant manner

What causes one to have this personality disorder?

  • In all honesty, it is not specifically known, but there are studies saying possible genetics or psychobiology. Speculation says some may believe the mismatching of parent-child relationships. 

This personality disorder is said to be found in more males than females, and is usually spotted in early teens BUT even if a teen has some of these characteristics, it does not ALWAYS mean that they have this disorder (it could be typical of their age and doesn’t guarantee them to grow up with narcissism) – which in my opinion is why sometimes it goes unknown or not correctly spotted.  

Bad things that could come of being narcissistic:

  • Relationship difficulties
  • Problems at work and school – with coworkers
  • Depression
  • Possible drug or alcohol abuse
  • Possible suicidal thoughts or behaviors

Although some of these complications can be for more than one disorder NOT just narcissism. 

Diagnosing the disorder?

  • I am not a therapist, so I am not sure how each of them do this, but from what I have gathered there is usually an exam or some kind of evaluation that can help the therapist recognize this disorder BUT because so many people may have more than one disorder it does make it more difficult to diagnose at times. 

With all of this being said, I read a couple of blogs that discussed this disorder, one being: http://www.willieverbegoodenough.com/resources/what-is-narcissism/ (that also mentions the DSM- 5) it was a good read and short. Maybe it will be something you would be interested in reading, we pretty much shared the same kind of information but their blog has a little bit of a twist to it & she has some sources she shares in her blog post that you can look into for further guidance. Thank you for reading, feel free to share, comment, like and follow. 

 

Your Fitness Blogger,

Shay-lon xxoo

Advertisements

I Am Only Human

Bound By Flaws.

For a first time in a long time.. 

 

It had occur to me that people see me as this “super human” amazing women who lifts heavy and walks with confidence and seemingly has her life together & everything she does just seems to be #goals (my blog, my workout, my future career, my online presence, physique, etc) & this scares me a little bit, actually a lot of bit. I mean granted I am thankful that I have inspired people, built relationships and rapport with people who now trust me enough to come to me with questions about fitness/health, have had a blog that went from 0 to hero in matter of months and that I tend to make people smile with my random comedic personality BUT what scares me is that people seem to think because of all this I did do, that they think they can’t do it. Like it took some magical pixie dust and oops the store ran out of it, so looks like no one else is capable of doing AMAZING things with their own life. 

 

I hate to give it to you like this.. BUT.. I am only human. That’s right, I came out the vagina the same way you did and I ended up on planet earth just like you. my baby self didn’t have a 6 pack and big arms, I surely wasn’t tying blogs at the age of 2 and I couldn’t have been that famous because I am still broke & I am willing to bet .. no one really even knows me besides family and friends and the people who know of me online. I could lie and say I am a HUGE deal but lets get real, I am not. Do I want to be? YES! because I have a lot to offer in my field and I know I am capable of GREAT things! I believe this. I know how hard I have to work in order to keep my physique in top notch if I want the “deals” and exposure, I know what it takes to keep my blog running smoothly so that all of you keep coming back to pester me about how much you love my stuff (lol)  & I know how much constant research, learning and events it will take for me to build more knowledge so I know what I am talking about and can teach others and spread my knowledge to others who listen to me. My life is not all daisies and wildflowers with tons of sunshine – I have cloudy days. I have periods and bloating that makes me look “gross” , I have struggled with body shaming, I have had the ups and downs of having a nice physique, I have failed in sporting events, I have struggled with my own self confidence and who I am, I have struggled financially, I have lost out on many opportunities (not being good enough), I have days where my abs are no longer there and my arms look like twigs and I am crying trying to pick myself back up. I have had many days where my post suck and I felt like walking away, and for goodness sake .. I know what it is like to have flaws. 

 

The problem is, maybe not all my flaws are seen with the human eye, maybe some of them are seen and you can pinpoint them in less than 5 seconds, but it doesn’t matter because I am no better than anyone else. Being in the fitness field can put a lot of pressure on you to be something like someone else in order to gain a huge following, more “friends”, more money and more fame. I don’t mind the pressure much anymore because I had to stop trying to be like her or him and had to try better at doing what I do best: being me, with flaws and all. I can’t always show my flaws because, hey it is a business, and I have to put on a good face and a good show if I want to keep everyone else around me happy, but when I do, it hits hard — because that is the one time I can let go and just allow myself to cry or get angry. Becoming a trainer isn’t easy either, hell .. you are responsible for someone outside of yourself and being an athlete, well hell you are responsible with being “good” and if not good, then you better be able to handle the harsh criticisms because the world is ready to chew you whole and spit you out. Truth is, during this whole time of learning about myself and wanting to go the distance in everything I do, I have learned I am as strong as I allow but I can’t handle every hurdle and I can’t handle every ball thrown at me.. because like everyone else, I am human and I am going to have days where I fall and getting back up will seem impossible. 

 

Hopefully this post gave people some perspective and understanding. Feel free to leave comments, likes, share it on social media or follow me 🙂 Thank you.

 

Your Fitness Blogger,

 

Shay-lon xxooo